What did she do and what should I do about it?

This is my first post. I'm sure there have been other similar threads about this, but I'm worried about what might have happened when my wife went out for girls night out over the last few months. We have been married eight years and have two little kids. I work long hours and she works part time. So several months ago she said she was depressed about getting older (we are in our 30's) and said she loves me but was restless with the marriage (her words). Then several weeks later she said she wanted to start going out with girlfriends to a country western dance bar for girls nights out -- twice a week every week. I didn't mind her going out once in a while but wasnt sure about two nights a week or anything that often. She asked me to be patient with her and said that she needed to do this and to let her go. We have always trusted each other and been good together so I said OK. I asked if she ever wanted me to go and she said I wouldnt like the place. So th is went on, every week, for a few months. Always on weeknights. I told her I didn't like the idea of guys slow dancing and hitting on her at the bar, but she said she would handle it. She said she always came home to me, which is true. The same group of girls also had a couple of weekends out of town together and that didn't bother me. But then one afternoon when I was home her phone rang while she was outside so I answered it, and it was a guy asking for her. They didn't talk long. She was polite and friendly. Then when she hung up, she had this big "Oh sh--" look on her face. I asked who he was and she said a friend of the girl who organized the girls nights out and he asked her if she wanted to go meet him for coffee (that day) but she said no. Later I asked her how long these beer joint nights were gonna continue. Soon after that she stopped going out. She said she was "getting too into it."

She didn't stay out super late but was usually gone two or three hours. It does seem fishy that all of the girls would want to go out that often (some are single/divorced and some are married) and I wonder if some of those nights she was meeting someone. Also, after a few months of this, she started doing something new in bed with me that she never did before. She initiated it. I asked where she learned that and she was vague, said she didn't know just wanted to try it. (I'm not sure if I'm allowed to describe it more then that.)

Anyway, it's over and we are OK but I can't help but wonder and I worry it could happen again. I think maybe she realized she needed to quit the whole thing before she got in too deep. Or maybe she did get in too deep and thought I would figure it out. I am worried she got too tempted and gave in after being hit on too many times.

I am working on letting it go and moving on. I can try to forgive her if she slept with someone or almost did. But what do you guys think really happened? I really want to know. I can take it. I hate to ask her too much about it now that it's over and we're doing OK because it could make things worse. But we need to trust each other again. And what can I do to avoid a repeat of this? What happened?

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