I just found this page last night. I'm 42 married fifteen years June 12. But we were separated and living under the same roof for four years. We have a 14 year old son. We've wronged each other. I deprived him sexually(yes four years) and he was mentally abusive to me. It wasn't until I discovered he found a woman that I started to get upset. Upset that he wouldn't go to counseling when I wanted him to, upset with myself for not being more vocal about pushing him to, etc. Anyway he started seeing talking to her on Valentines Day and they met on Adult Friendfinder. I knew something was going on because he was withdrawing more as time went on. He did text me later in their relationship from their bed in the hotel room saying it wasn't too late and we could work on things. Due to medical issues, I didn't respond right away. I tend to get brain fogged. A week went by and he told her he was falling in love with her. I was like hmm a week would make a difference(told him last night I don't believe he was falling in love with her, he just felt rejected! ) Anyway I'm trying to make this short. There was a lot of confusion and stringing along as he ended up going to see her once to taste water from her new cooler. Yeah right! He was supposed to come home and plan our vacation with me. At one point he said sex wasn't good with me. I am not violent but I hit him. He said it in front of my older son and my older son got mad. Then I found texts on his cell phone from her, "I love you sweetie. " I went on a rampage, threw his clothes down for him to pack after he got off work on an overnight shift. Threw my rings at him, a glass of green tea, and planned a separation picture burning party.
He made calls when he went to storage and was told I couldn't legally throw him out but he felt it was best to leave. I was relieved at the time because I knew I couldn't be around him if he continued to see her. He went to her place, I went to the bar. The drinking felt good that night but I became traumatized as the night went on. I had not been an emotional person until all of the stuff came up. I had talked to my husband as he was leaving and he talked as if he was going to come home but he didn't. I knew he was with her and it hurt me so much. An old school friend came to try to comfort me and it was sweet of him but I wanted my husband there instead. I just wanted him to choose me. He has now but this is very difficult for me to deal with. Last night, I made him delete his pictures of her. He was hesitant. She's moved on and active on her AFF again and he says that has helped him to move on seeing she has pretty fast. I'm trying not to do to him what he did to me from our first problem. Trying not to throw her in his face. He accused me of having the hots for a guy I didn't like in that way. That's a story in itself but it caused a forbidden fruit type of deal but I didn't cheat. I sensed this guy has a lot of infidelity issues himself. Anyway, being here and reading has helped. Unfortunately he is now having trouble sexually. I'm the one who used to have issues until I started taking Zumba classes. I'm sure the other woman thing has helped too. But he's becoming insecure because of it. I told him last last night I'm very insecure because he's put her on a pedestal. Oh well thanks for reading.
He made calls when he went to storage and was told I couldn't legally throw him out but he felt it was best to leave. I was relieved at the time because I knew I couldn't be around him if he continued to see her. He went to her place, I went to the bar. The drinking felt good that night but I became traumatized as the night went on. I had not been an emotional person until all of the stuff came up. I had talked to my husband as he was leaving and he talked as if he was going to come home but he didn't. I knew he was with her and it hurt me so much. An old school friend came to try to comfort me and it was sweet of him but I wanted my husband there instead. I just wanted him to choose me. He has now but this is very difficult for me to deal with. Last night, I made him delete his pictures of her. He was hesitant. She's moved on and active on her AFF again and he says that has helped him to move on seeing she has pretty fast. I'm trying not to do to him what he did to me from our first problem. Trying not to throw her in his face. He accused me of having the hots for a guy I didn't like in that way. That's a story in itself but it caused a forbidden fruit type of deal but I didn't cheat. I sensed this guy has a lot of infidelity issues himself. Anyway, being here and reading has helped. Unfortunately he is now having trouble sexually. I'm the one who used to have issues until I started taking Zumba classes. I'm sure the other woman thing has helped too. But he's becoming insecure because of it. I told him last last night I'm very insecure because he's put her on a pedestal. Oh well thanks for reading.
Put the internet to work for you.
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