I'm here looking for some advice. I've been lurking for a while, and started one thread looking for keylogger advice.
Long story short - I'm in a 10 year same sex relationship. We've been living together for 5 years. I just turned 39, she's 36. No kids. We're common law spouses where we live.
She made a new friend in August of this year. I immediately had a bad gut feeling about this girl, but I was told I was being insecure and not trusting.
I checked her phone and email for a while back when it was starting, but then she started never letting her phone out of her sight, and changed her email password.
I recently figured out I knew her mobile account password, and checked phone records. There are an unbelievable number and length of calls to the OW. Like a 329 minute call, and others over 200 minutes. Starting in about October/November and still going.
I have been in IC since November, trying to deal with my insecurity issues - nice how she managed to make me think this was about my problems.
I recently installed webwatcher on the computer at home, and bingo, found her new email password. Found an email to the OW full of I love yous and I miss yous and crap like that. And found messages they exchanged about their 8 month date.
I did a soft confront about a month ago, without sufficient evidence. She denied everything. I even left for a couple of days to get my head clear. When I came back, we never mentioned it again, which I realize is odd.
Basically, I know I have to end this. But I'm not ready yet. I'm not ready to lose the life we have together and to be single again and to have to tell the world that our outwardly perfect relationship is over and was, in fact, a giant lie.
I'm not even really sure what I'm asking for here. Advice, I guess. Support, I guess. And I need to make a plan.
Long story short - I'm in a 10 year same sex relationship. We've been living together for 5 years. I just turned 39, she's 36. No kids. We're common law spouses where we live.
She made a new friend in August of this year. I immediately had a bad gut feeling about this girl, but I was told I was being insecure and not trusting.
I checked her phone and email for a while back when it was starting, but then she started never letting her phone out of her sight, and changed her email password.
I recently figured out I knew her mobile account password, and checked phone records. There are an unbelievable number and length of calls to the OW. Like a 329 minute call, and others over 200 minutes. Starting in about October/November and still going.
I have been in IC since November, trying to deal with my insecurity issues - nice how she managed to make me think this was about my problems.
I recently installed webwatcher on the computer at home, and bingo, found her new email password. Found an email to the OW full of I love yous and I miss yous and crap like that. And found messages they exchanged about their 8 month date.
I did a soft confront about a month ago, without sufficient evidence. She denied everything. I even left for a couple of days to get my head clear. When I came back, we never mentioned it again, which I realize is odd.
Basically, I know I have to end this. But I'm not ready yet. I'm not ready to lose the life we have together and to be single again and to have to tell the world that our outwardly perfect relationship is over and was, in fact, a giant lie.
I'm not even really sure what I'm asking for here. Advice, I guess. Support, I guess. And I need to make a plan.
Put the internet to work for you.
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