At what point is it time to save yourself?

Quick background: Wife is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse by a family member Her family rugswept the whole thing and contiunues to Wife has been diagnosed with clinical depression and PTSD We have been married for almost 9 years and have a 5yo daughter We have been together a total of 15 years She is a SAHM, I work full time but also handle about 70% of the household/parenting duties Since we had our daughter, our relationship has been on a decline. She is frequently hostile and rages over insignificant things. She shows no appreciation for anything I do and it is never enough. She is overwhelmed by being a mother and often is unable to spend more than a few hours with our daughter without completely shutting down and retreating to the bedroom to isolate herself and cry. We have little to no connection anymore, I dread being around her due to the extreme negativity, anger and helplessness. I don't tell you these things to vilify her. She is sick and as such can't help it. I get that. This is what makes it so hard for me to change my miserable situation. I am filled with guilt for thinking about leaving her. I have stood by her and supported her all these years. Things had gotten mug better before we were married, but since becoming a mother the situation has become increasingly unbearable for me. I also have guilt and conflict about what is best for my D. She loves her mom and needs her, but I am seeing the effect of her being around such an angry, negative person on a regular basis. So the real issue I am grappling with is at what point do I decide I've done all I can do and save myself? Another mitigating factor is that I was diagnosed with a very serious heart condition the year my daughter was born. While my heart has greatly improved, I have no doubt that my lifespan has been shortened. Do I have 3 more years or 30? I don't know. How can I afford to squander the time I have left in such a miserable situation? My cardiologist tells me that stress is about the worst thing for my heart. That's the only thing I get out of this marriage. I have told her many times that I would always take care of her, never give up on her. How can I now break my promise? Not sure I expect any answers, but thanks for reading. Posted via Mobile Device

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