Just saw this email...Please help me before I lose it...seriously. I feel SICK

My original post is below...very quickly, I didn't like closeness of husband and his female friend at work (even if it was an overreaction of mine). He said he would stop being friends etc. Fast forward a year later, we get an invitation in the mail for her son's birthday party at home. He said he knew NOTHING about it, wasn't going to respond, etc. (Side note, I'm 1 month post partum right now so I'm feeling VERY emotional) Today for SOME reason I checked his email, and I see this email he wrote her yesterday (party was today): _______, Please do not reply to this email or mention it to anyone. We got the invitation to ___'s birthday in the mail and it was a problem. Needless to say we are not going to be attending the party tomorrow, however we do have a party at the same location at noon and it is possible we may run into you there. if that happens, please do not talk to me or ___(me--his wife) or even acknowledge us in any way. Again, i am asking that you keep this email confidential and not share it with anyone. if work people ask if we are going, please say you don't know or you never heard back. thank you. This has NOTHING to do with the content but the fact that he LIED. He lied. He said he didn't communicate with her. He said he doesn't at all unless necessary. He said he wasn't going to respond about the party in any way. I want to call her and say why do you keep insisting on being friends with my husband? But I know it's HE who answers to me, NOT her. I want to yell at him right now...instead I'm sitting here steaming and I am going into shut down mode. What do I do? This was my post from before... ORIGINAL POST: I've posted about my situation in the past. Short story--I didnt like DH's female friend at work, nothing inappropriate ever but I didnt like how it was only real friend because he's not social anyways and I'd rather him have more friends...plus he spent more time looking at her FB page which I didnt like (this happened right after we had our first kid). Then he said he wasnt friwnsly at all anymore with her. Then we went to a kids party and I saw her being social with him and realized he never told me that he was social again with her at work, like not super friendly but I wanted it to be only work related only. After workjng through a counselor, communication stuff/books everything has been a lot better. Fast forward to today, we recently had our 2nd baby and in the mail is an invitation to her kids' birthday party. WHY would we get an invite??? I've seen her at other parties and we dont talk anymore (we used to be friendly with each other when husband was friends). Husband wasnt at the kids parties so i dont know he would react-- i guess/hope not talk to her but now i dont know. We just got the invite and immediately im upset--why invite us? My husband says he's surprised and has no idea why she would. He said he only talks to her at work if necessary. I said she would get the message ur not friends if you made that clear--obviously u didnt. Its like bringing up old wounds again, making me upset. This ruined the first time at home with our first baby and I feel that pain again. What do I do? I dont want to talk to him, i feel like this is going to put me over the edge with baby blues. I am not going to tell him this but I want him to call her in front of me, say we cant go and ask why she invited us. Or make it clear to her they are not friends. Im upset

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