Okay so this post may make me sound dreadful, sexist, pig-ignorant, naive, discriminatory and selfish but I've thought a hell of a lot about this and I need to vent.
I've been going out with her for a short period, but enough to become attached to her. To begin with everything was great, we were both romantically involved, texting 24/7, talking, messaging, having sex and then she moved away back home, before relocating for employment purposes.
Now, I had known of her bisexuality early on...and to begin with, I thought it would be something I could deal with. But sadly I feel so angry, upset and negative about it. Not purely because of her sexuality, but because of her and her actions AND her bisexuality.
She is very outgoing, care free about sex, whereas I had always been traditional, 100% no casual sex, ONS or cheating. I just feel society is too relaxed and too much freedom gas been given. She's the opposite,before me, she was always having sex with loads of guys and been naughty.
Despite this I've tried age tried to accept her, I do love her, and now it's hard to do something about it.
The reasons I have grown to hate her sexuality is because I think she's having an emotional affair with a girl. I've not confronted my girlfriend directly about it, but we've talked around the subject and similar topics, and she's (recently) always becoming offended easily. For example, the other day she got uppity because we had difference of opinion snout behaviours whilst out.
I see messages from her and this girl on Fscebook a lot. She always talks about her, and recently, I see there online and she messages her like an hour or so before me. This never used to be the case. Before we used to be like 'ping-pong' constant talking, and even up until a week or two fairly frequent. Now it seems I'm the last thing on her mind. I'm not longer a priority.
I'm searing with anger at the idea of her actually wanting to be with this girl. I completely understand I know she's bi, but I don't see why I should always feel so accepting that one day she should go off with a girl if she please. I guess this is my mistake of dating outside of heterosexuality.
In my eyes, your either 100% into me, or your not. If your not we're through. I just feel my girlfriend is wanting the cake and is eating it. I'm paranoid for sure, but I just feel that regardless of if she is or isn't, if she isn't I think I should end it, and date a straight girl. I'm not being second best, and to be honest I felt it for last two weeks. And it's gonna get worse I think.
I'm going to end it with her because I feel it's right. She won't have to keep pretending she's into me, and can devote 100% emotional investment into the girl! rather than 75%!
The point is, even though bisexuality has nothing purely to do with this,...I hate the idea of it because of my girlfriend. Whenever I think of the things my girlfriend has potentially done, will do or about this girl it makes me hate the entire idea of being bi.
Perhaps this is my anxiety, depression and overall low mood that is causing this...I just can't separate the two psychologically. I don't feel bisexuals are able to like a life with a member of the opposite sex- indefinitely. Even though you hear stories of happily married couples...they end up divorcing after 20years. This is one of the other reasons I want to leave.
Put the internet to work for you.
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