I've been with a girl for about 10 months, minus two months where we split up due to issues that are now addressed and moved on from. However, despite thinking the world of each other and getting on incredibly well, she's dropped what feels like a bombshell. A few months back i was led to believe she was really ill, to the extent that she had to be resuscitated numerous times. This was at a point where i was not in a relationship with her but still remained good friends. Whilst she was ill, i was being kept updated by some 'friends' she had who were looking after her who were telling me how ill she was. Although not being together anymore i still really cared for her so was understandably very upset when i thought she could have been lost. I was told Doctors had found she had a heart condition (which is still true) and after about a month of about 5 episodes of falling into cardiac arrest, Doctors fixed the condition so that her heart rate wouldn't fluctuate exces sively; which had caused the cardiac arrests.
I've cut down some aspects but this is where things changed. Today (5 months after this saga and we're back together) she seemed intent on getting something off her chest so i encouraged her. From a girl who has been extremely caring towards me for the time we've been together with minor hiccups, i didn't expect anything as serious as she was making out it was, in my eyes anyhow. After much persuasion she tells me that her being unresponsive in Hospital was largely fabricated by her friends 'for a laugh'. I never knew these friends but apparently, after being in hospital for a night due to a genuine heart problem, the next day they decided to tell people that she was critically ill and might not survive. Hearing this i said how twisted that obviously is and she said she agreed, but despite trying to get them to stop, they wouldn't give her phone back and she was too weak to do it forcefully. I concede that she may have been weak but i'd feel mortified if i found out what my s upposed friends were doing and have made more of an effort to let me know the truth. As opposed to being in and out of Hospital for the next month, as i was led to believe, she only went in once more for tests and did have something done to correct her problem. Instead of being told this i was still under the impression she had to be resuscitated more than 5 times in about a month. I saw her several times in between as we go to the same uni, and i was looking after her and had time alone with her being grateful for the fact that i still had her here.
Although she didn't make this thing up, her going along with it as she 'didn't know how i'd react' to being told it was a lie has angered me alot. It was a time i was preparing uni assignments and i was close to asking for an extension as it was the weekend before a test. My friends were told the same thing as me and even my parents were troubled by it all as they had a decent relationship with my girlfriend. In my head i just feel as though it's really messed up that she went along with it and since it's happened, has talked about it with me and continued with the same storyline of it all. She accepts that it's her fault for not confessing what had happened and is sorry but i don't know if i should be considering this just too much? I don't want to be loveblind here. It has been such fun being with her but i feel taken for a mug. When reversing the roles i said even if i did think that a reaction to finding out it wasn't all true would have been bad, it's nothing compared to the month i was very upset thinking that she was gone. She said she didn't know what to do when she found out what her friends had told people, but to me that doesn't justify anything because of the grief she was aware i was being put through. There were times alone and when she did have her phone that she could have let me know what was really going on. Being told five months after what really happened doesn't make me feel any better about her newfound honesty.
Please any questions about anything i haven't explained or you're wondering please feel free to ask. I'm still quite upset so may have not have explained something very well, i'm sorry. I feel if she could lie to me about this then i wouldn't have much trust, if i'm as justified as i think i am in being upset. Need advice on whether this would be too much for you or whether you'd forgive the person and stay with them. I have friends i could talk to but it would be nice to hear some comments from someone without bias, thanks guys.
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