We've been married for over 20 years. We agree that we don't get presents for every event and holiday, but we always have for birthdays and Christmas. My husband also knows that I had an issue with my birthday and Christmas in my first marraige because my first husband didn't bother to get me anything. I'm also easy to please and very appreciative of gifts and would value a well thought out $1 gift as much as (or more than) diamonds.
This year my husband was visiting family during my birthday and I got a "Happy Birthday" text. That's it. I figured he'd bring something when he got home. He didn't. A couple of days later he told me about this great place he found that we could hike around at and that we could go there that weekend. I said, "sounds great. Is that my birthday present"? He said, "would that be good enough"? I said yes, mostly because I wanted to convince myself that it was good enough and it would have been if it had been more like him wanting to take me there for my birthday...instead it was more like "oh yeah, your birthday...will this do?"
So, now his birthday is coming up and I got him the perfect gift that he totally loves and is all excited about. I didn't want to "forget" his birthday too because that's passive aggressive games.
I told him how much research went in to getting him this model, etc. I don't think it has ever dawned on him that I feel he blew off my birthday. I'm really hurt and can't help feeling that I'm becoming more of an afterthought to him.
I know I should just talk to him, but I don't want to seem petty and I also don't want to make him feel badly and I don't want a 4 month late birthday present just because I said something either.
Should I say anything at all or just let it go? :confused:
This year my husband was visiting family during my birthday and I got a "Happy Birthday" text. That's it. I figured he'd bring something when he got home. He didn't. A couple of days later he told me about this great place he found that we could hike around at and that we could go there that weekend. I said, "sounds great. Is that my birthday present"? He said, "would that be good enough"? I said yes, mostly because I wanted to convince myself that it was good enough and it would have been if it had been more like him wanting to take me there for my birthday...instead it was more like "oh yeah, your birthday...will this do?"
So, now his birthday is coming up and I got him the perfect gift that he totally loves and is all excited about. I didn't want to "forget" his birthday too because that's passive aggressive games.
I told him how much research went in to getting him this model, etc. I don't think it has ever dawned on him that I feel he blew off my birthday. I'm really hurt and can't help feeling that I'm becoming more of an afterthought to him.
I know I should just talk to him, but I don't want to seem petty and I also don't want to make him feel badly and I don't want a 4 month late birthday present just because I said something either.
Should I say anything at all or just let it go? :confused:
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