My husband and I have been married 7+ years now- together for 9. Sex has become less and less frequent over the years. I live with the following problem:
1) My husband does not like sex in the morning - we haven't done this since the first month together - and I mean any kind of sex. Weird for a guy right?
2) My husband takes Ambien and an additional over the counter sleep med in order to get to sleep at night (this comes from years of shift work, but still no excuse for this addiction). As soon as the Ambien starts to kick in (when we go to bed) he almost becomes a different person. He can't stop eating - yes, in bed -then passes out. Sometimes he does get handsy with me but it would be like having sex with an aggressive drunk - when you're sober. And when we have engaged in that he has a difficult time maintaining an erection and/or finishing so now I avoid him at all costs once he's taken his pills.
This means, the only time we have sex are the evenings when he's run out of his prescription. I have to initiate since he believes I don't like him touching me - even though I've explained its only when he's stoned, but he doesn't believe that should matter. He does not understand that he's a different person when he's on it - he thinks I'm overreacting.
I've tried many times discussing this problem with him, insisting he either gets off the medication entirely (not going to happen) or he takes it later in the evening - after we're already in bed.
Any suggestions?
1) My husband does not like sex in the morning - we haven't done this since the first month together - and I mean any kind of sex. Weird for a guy right?
2) My husband takes Ambien and an additional over the counter sleep med in order to get to sleep at night (this comes from years of shift work, but still no excuse for this addiction). As soon as the Ambien starts to kick in (when we go to bed) he almost becomes a different person. He can't stop eating - yes, in bed -then passes out. Sometimes he does get handsy with me but it would be like having sex with an aggressive drunk - when you're sober. And when we have engaged in that he has a difficult time maintaining an erection and/or finishing so now I avoid him at all costs once he's taken his pills.
This means, the only time we have sex are the evenings when he's run out of his prescription. I have to initiate since he believes I don't like him touching me - even though I've explained its only when he's stoned, but he doesn't believe that should matter. He does not understand that he's a different person when he's on it - he thinks I'm overreacting.
I've tried many times discussing this problem with him, insisting he either gets off the medication entirely (not going to happen) or he takes it later in the evening - after we're already in bed.
Any suggestions?
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