I have been married for one year, and in a relationship with my wife for 4 total years. I met my wife 2 years after a divorce from a 10 year marriage, that honestly I felt better divorced than married to my jobless ex. She never worked, reason for that was I bent over backwards, always trying to make her happy with material things, (trips, new purses, clothes, etc...) just for her to show me love and affection. After that failed marriage, I never thought I would love again, and if I did it would have to be with a truly selfless person, and someone who would help provide to the family financially as well as emotionally. Always she would have to accept my children as her own, and be a motherly figure to them when we are together. It was a truly tall order to ask of anyone, but I did find her, miraculously, and I have been so in love these few years. She wasn't working when we met, but she was collecting disability, which helped out with random expen ses. That stopped 2 years ago, and my job just wasn't cutting it on providing for a household of 6. Her, me, her 2 daughters, and my 2 daughters. Plus the courts had me paying a big chunk of, only to my ex for child support. No problems there, I have to take care of my kids. But the one problem was, her ex never paid child support because he couldn't keep a job for more than 3 weeks.
Since times were tough, and our kids were getting older, youngest being 16, we both decided that I should pursue a career that is going to support us All! That is when I received an offer for a position In Kuwait. The plan was for her to move here in one year after her daughter graduates high school. So, to make a long story a little shorter, I am working here, she and is not working, and I am covering two households. I currently provide her with 40% of my take home pay, and I get 40%, with the rest going to savings to pay off debt in the future.
In the beginning she was okay with everything, but lately she has been dropping little hint images in Facebook private message like, 'a real man should never make his good woman pay for his bad exes mistakes' & 'women who don't ask for much deserve it all' which is true, she never asks for nothing. But sometimes she says that she feels she got the short end of stick, and my ex got all these nice things. I quickly added up the monetary total and explained that she receives far more compensation than my ex ever received. I just feel like I might have fallen into the enabling trap again, and I don't want to make the mistake I made before. Do I give enough? Should I give more? What is the standard split of income between households? Any advice would be appreciated.
Since times were tough, and our kids were getting older, youngest being 16, we both decided that I should pursue a career that is going to support us All! That is when I received an offer for a position In Kuwait. The plan was for her to move here in one year after her daughter graduates high school. So, to make a long story a little shorter, I am working here, she and is not working, and I am covering two households. I currently provide her with 40% of my take home pay, and I get 40%, with the rest going to savings to pay off debt in the future.
In the beginning she was okay with everything, but lately she has been dropping little hint images in Facebook private message like, 'a real man should never make his good woman pay for his bad exes mistakes' & 'women who don't ask for much deserve it all' which is true, she never asks for nothing. But sometimes she says that she feels she got the short end of stick, and my ex got all these nice things. I quickly added up the monetary total and explained that she receives far more compensation than my ex ever received. I just feel like I might have fallen into the enabling trap again, and I don't want to make the mistake I made before. Do I give enough? Should I give more? What is the standard split of income between households? Any advice would be appreciated.
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