This will be a long one, and I apologize! I have been with my husband for 18 years, married for 10. We have been together since we were 14 years old. We have two children together ages 12 & 14. Recently his father went to prison for conning people out of millions of dollars. His mother knew all of this, but of course she never did any wrong. They made their living ripping innocent people off, and now that he's in prison she is unable to support herself.
He is constantly letting her stay at our house when we're out of town, leaves his vehicle fully fueled for her to drive, and allows her to have open access to our home while we are at work. Of course, he never tells me any of this, he denies it all the time. He also pays certain bills for her. She's been living with a relative and has since been approved for some sort of housing (that you and I are probably paying for in taxes) but she cannot afford her bills. I found a signed letter he had left for her to the housing authority stating that he would help her pay bills by providing her with $300 per month. Not a word was said to me about this. And I believe he's currently paying her cell phone bill and lord only knows what else.
She is always texting him saying don't forget to leave me the car, with fuel and $20. Really, why do we have to support you? She's capable of working but would rather her baby boy take care of her. She refuses to get a job. And don't forget the nightly text "good night, love you bunches baby"
I have a vehicle that my daughter (gets her permit in 1.5 months) would like to have. It's paid off and I think if we have a vehicle our child would like then we should give it to her. She's a straight A student with her head on straight. I had previously let his mom drive it for awhile (and my husband always made sure she had gas money) until she kept driving it till it overheated and now it won't run. The other day she says "what about my car, it's still just sitting in the drive-way." So my husband tells me we need to get the car fixed for her. I said we're giving it to our daughter (It's my car, I made the payments, titled only in my name). He then says I'm a ***** to his mom. Really? So I say that she is welcome to drive the car until she can get a job and save up the money to buy an old beater (he knows she's 'too good' to drive an old car). That provokes him to call me selfish, then says no, you're not selfish, you're a f***. Seriously?? And even letting he r drive it, he would be paying for the gas and I would have to maintain insurance and pay for the insurance.
He is taking from his family to provide for someone that is more than capable of getting off her ace and getting a job. I don't mind helping someone when we're in a position to help, but not when they're not willing to help themselves. And mind you, we're a month behind on our house payment and don't have insurance coverage on the vehicles because his money disappears. We are already spending $500/month on title loans that he got for his dad before he went to prison.
Anytime I try to say how I feel, he always takes her side. He always has and it breaks my heart. I feel like I'm not entitled to have my own thoughts, feelings, or opinions regarding anything. I love him, but I don't think I can deal with the same old crap anymore. Maybe it's time to tell his mom that she won, she can have her baby back :confused::(
He is constantly letting her stay at our house when we're out of town, leaves his vehicle fully fueled for her to drive, and allows her to have open access to our home while we are at work. Of course, he never tells me any of this, he denies it all the time. He also pays certain bills for her. She's been living with a relative and has since been approved for some sort of housing (that you and I are probably paying for in taxes) but she cannot afford her bills. I found a signed letter he had left for her to the housing authority stating that he would help her pay bills by providing her with $300 per month. Not a word was said to me about this. And I believe he's currently paying her cell phone bill and lord only knows what else.
She is always texting him saying don't forget to leave me the car, with fuel and $20. Really, why do we have to support you? She's capable of working but would rather her baby boy take care of her. She refuses to get a job. And don't forget the nightly text "good night, love you bunches baby"
I have a vehicle that my daughter (gets her permit in 1.5 months) would like to have. It's paid off and I think if we have a vehicle our child would like then we should give it to her. She's a straight A student with her head on straight. I had previously let his mom drive it for awhile (and my husband always made sure she had gas money) until she kept driving it till it overheated and now it won't run. The other day she says "what about my car, it's still just sitting in the drive-way." So my husband tells me we need to get the car fixed for her. I said we're giving it to our daughter (It's my car, I made the payments, titled only in my name). He then says I'm a ***** to his mom. Really? So I say that she is welcome to drive the car until she can get a job and save up the money to buy an old beater (he knows she's 'too good' to drive an old car). That provokes him to call me selfish, then says no, you're not selfish, you're a f***. Seriously?? And even letting he r drive it, he would be paying for the gas and I would have to maintain insurance and pay for the insurance.
He is taking from his family to provide for someone that is more than capable of getting off her ace and getting a job. I don't mind helping someone when we're in a position to help, but not when they're not willing to help themselves. And mind you, we're a month behind on our house payment and don't have insurance coverage on the vehicles because his money disappears. We are already spending $500/month on title loans that he got for his dad before he went to prison.
Anytime I try to say how I feel, he always takes her side. He always has and it breaks my heart. I feel like I'm not entitled to have my own thoughts, feelings, or opinions regarding anything. I love him, but I don't think I can deal with the same old crap anymore. Maybe it's time to tell his mom that she won, she can have her baby back :confused::(
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