| I could really use some objective advice. I am a married 41 year old professional woman. I have been married 12 years, and together with my husband for 18 years. My husband and I had a pretty decent marriage until about three years ago, when he lost his job. He had been an executive, and made a tremendous amount of money. In the three since he was let go, he has just fallen into a massive depression. Although he continues to be a wonderful father, he has not been a good partner. Long story short, i have finally gotten to a place I never thought I would be - I don't know if I want to be married to him anymore. Meanwhile, I have become infatuated with another man. Everytime I see him, I get the whole butterflies in my stomach, etc. My husband and I have a large circle of friends with whom we socialize frequently. One of the married men in this circle has been spending a lot of time hanging out with our group alone, since his wife has decided to basically check out of their marriage. In any event, in the past month or two, when we are together, he and I have been spending a good deal of time talking to each other. He is always really complimentary to me, telling me that I am "hot" or that he thinks I look like a beautiful celebrity. When we talk, he stands close to me, with his body facing mine. He hears things that I say even when we are not next to each other, and, and can recall things I have said at other gatherings. I have sometimes caught him staring at me. A few weeks ago, me and another friend were talking to him. My friend said to him something about a hair cut, and I chimed in saying that he should do such and such with his hair, and it would be awesome. Well, the following weekend, he shows up, and guess what? He had gotten the exact haircut I had suggested. He also kept staring at me that night from across the room. Otherwise, he is such a gentleman to me, offering me his last drink or offering to lend me something for the week, that I know he couldn't live without. One last point, my husband is generally around, and he and this man are friends. My husband will often come stand in between me and this man while we are talking, and basically take over the conversation. In any case, this guy stays where he is, and will generally wait until my husband leaves, in order to resume our conversation. Well, I saw him this weekend, in a small group of friends, which included my husband's brother. My husband had another obligation, and was not at the gathering. He showed up after having been in a minor accident earlier. Well, unlike other times, he seemed a bit distant. Although we had a few conversations, he didn't stand next to me all night, as he has previously. I will say I wasn't excatly in the best place that evening either. I am a very close to the vest person, and do not actively flirt, especially with a married man. I have never contacted him, etc. outside of seeing him at a social event. He has not contacted me either. One last point, this guy is super nice and considerate generally. What I want to know is whether it is possible that this man is attracted or interested in me in any way. And before anyone mentions it, I know all about the infidelity issues, etc. I am in a bad place in my marriage, and it is likely to come apart at the seems regardless. His marriage has also fallen apart. I would just like to have a guy's perspective on what I have observed. | |||
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