I learned in my first marriage that sometimes all my ex wanted to do was talk about her problems at work but she never really wanted me to solve any of her problems. She just needed someone to talk to. My need to solve her problems caused a lot of stress in the marriage and I see that now.
Not wanting to make the same mistake with my new gf. I ask the question how do you best navigate this balance between listening and doing? I don't know if she's looking for me to say something or if she just wants someone who'll listen.
Sometimes when we get into these discussions I'll flat out ask her what do you want to do about it and she'll say something like I just have to focus on something else. But the problem will still bother her and it affects us when we go out sometimes. Is it ultimately up to her to figure out her own problems? Curious to see how others feel about this.
Not wanting to make the same mistake with my new gf. I ask the question how do you best navigate this balance between listening and doing? I don't know if she's looking for me to say something or if she just wants someone who'll listen.
Sometimes when we get into these discussions I'll flat out ask her what do you want to do about it and she'll say something like I just have to focus on something else. But the problem will still bother her and it affects us when we go out sometimes. Is it ultimately up to her to figure out her own problems? Curious to see how others feel about this.
Put the internet to work for you.
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