How to build and maintain trust

Recently I've thought that one of the things that I really want from a relationship, and haven't had in any of my relationships or two marriages before, is trust. And I've wondered how trust gets built. I mean, the obvious one is - don't lie. But I found a youtube video of my favorite relationship researcher, John Gottman, who has this to say about how to build trust:

http://ift.tt/1n5DCCc

To summarize:

A: Awareness (be aware of your partner's moods and those
moments when they are trying to connect with you)
T: Turning Toward. If your partner is trying to connect with you
in some way, don't brush them off. Give them your full
attention.
T: Tolerance. Be okay with the two of you having different
opinions and perspectives
U: Understanding. Really try to understand your partner's
perspective (even though you might not agree)
N: Nondefensive Response: Don't get defensive. (Dr. Gottman
has admitted this is probably the hardest step but there are
ways of training yourself to do this)
E: Empathy. Show empathy for your partner's perspective


Interestingly, Dr. Gottman also points out in this video that the beginning of betrayal is when one of the partners starts thinking they could do better than the other.

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