Pages

Search blog and web

getting confused

  • Thread Starter

Hi there,

This is the first topic for me in relationship forum and I hope I'll get a good information regarding my topic.

In short, I have been in UK for a short period and I am looking for a white girl for marriage. Actually I am an Arabian and Muslim, thus I am looking for a Muslim girl. But in case that I could not get a Muslim girl do you think it is easy find a girl that accepts Islam rules such as (NO drink, NO bar) and also believe in serious relationship because as you know Islam support this kind of relationship.

I know my topic is a kind of strange but really I would like to know about girls thinking here in UK.

Waiting for your experience.

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

Please talk to me

  • Thread Starter

Come back to me, I need you. I'm completely lost without you. I don't know what to do. Just talk to me. I don't want you to leave, I'm so lonely and sad

Posted from TSR Mobile

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

hi gorgeous

  • Thread Starter

ll b ma friend? if not already in realation?

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

GIrls

  • Thread Starter

If a man has kinda evil looking eyes when he laughs, would this put you off and why? When he has a straight face he doesnt look evil and quite good looking.
Yes talking about myself -.-
Just that when i laugh my eyes get small my eyebrows look like this V and look evil.
cba raising my eyebrows when i always laugh to look like a nice guy LOL.

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

Advice About Space

Hello everyone,
I am currently going through a convoluted form of separation. I am staying on the 3rd floor in a friends apartment while my wife and son live on the 1st floor. We still live in the same multi family home so that we can easily tend to our son who is 16m. My wife is dealing with a serious case of "i love you but i'm not in love with you". Leading up to this, i was oblivious to the fact that she felt like I was treating her in a way that was less than acceptable to her. I have been the primary source of income for our family for the last 15 months or so and I have been working a ton. Over the course of the last 3 months or so, she has been "testing me" by acting noticeably more upset than normal as she put it to a friend. Now as a man, I am no mind reader and respond much better with direct communication not through body language. I didn't pay much attention to her in regards to how she felt and didn't listen very well. I accept full responsibility for the things that she said I have done and the way that she said that I treated her.

That being said, I know that their are 2 sides to this story and she did things as well. We are now past the point of pointing out each others flaws and what we did wrong. I'm pointed in the direction of reconciliation and restoration while shes point in the direction of... well... I'm not sure, Space?

She's been asking for space and to be honest I'm not sure what constitutes space to a woman. To me it's when you have absolutely no contact with someone whatsoever. I have asked her what she would consider as space with no real direction. I even got her a really nice hotel room for the weekend in the city where she is right now, but does this constitute as space? I'm trying to detach but its hard when you have so many questions. Each day has been better and better in regards to me asking her questions about us. The past 2 days I haven't said anything about us.

Also, we are currently in couples therapy initiated by me. She hasn't tried to back out or make an excuse not to go. She has willingly gone every time so thats a good sign right? :confused:

thanks for anything you can send my way guys.

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

Now I have my proof

I am embarrassed and ashamed of myself to say this but I thought my wife was having an affair. Now, I know that isn't the case at all. We sat down last night and had a long discussion. She is VERY depressed and wrung out emotionally. She is FAR too depressed to ever even think about having a affair.

Let me start from the beginning. We moved from Ft.Worth to a small town. The town I grew up in. We moved next door to my parents so we could help them out. They're both getting older and dont have anyone else to help them out. Now, my dad has terminal cancer.

Not long after we moved here my parents started treating her very bad. She is a very outspoken person, doesn't hold anything in and tells it like it is. Maybe too much a times. My parents are not like that, they are the type that doesn't like to discuss things. Don't talk about it and it will go away kind of thing. They've always been that way. My wife on the other hand is the type that when she sees something going on that isnt right, she will let that person know about it. That's why my parents haven't liked her. In fact, they've done nothing to repair the rift that's between them and my wife. They have always lived in this town and maybe I'm wrong but it's part of a small town mentality, especially this one, to keep things bottled up.

I've told my parents on severals occasions that, "I know don't like her and that hurts. It hurts because of what we left to come here to help you out. She is my wife, and it hurts that the to of you can't get along, she is my wife and just like it says in the Bible, a man shall leave his parents and cleave to his wife and that it exactly what I am going do."

Several other reasons why she is depressed. She hates the job she is in, and there are no others in this town. I was recently diagnosed with Epilepsy and can't drive. By the way, my boss fired me over this. She worries about me constantly because I am home by myself all the time. She is also very worried about how bills are going to be paid since she is the sole provider right now. She even works extra shifts to make sure we have enough money to make it, and for me thats hard to bare because I am suppose to be the provider and I cant do it right now.

Now, the reason I thought she might be having an affair is that she spends a lot of time on Facebook. I have checked her history because I have access to her account and there is absolutely no proof that she has even attempted to start one. Again I feel embarrassed and ashamed.

She wants to leave here and go back to where we were living, but we just can't right now. There is no money to be able to do so. To tell the truth, I'm not that happy here either and wish we'd never moved here. We both left good jobs to move here and help my parents. Boy, have I learned a lesson the hard way.
I hate seeing my wife like this. She told me she cries everyday, she does it every day on the way to work so I won't see it.
Now, I am in one heck of a mess and I can't seem to dig my way out of the crater my life has become.

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

Did I screw up or was it not going to happen at all?

  • Thread Starter

Was at a friend's 21st party yesterday, he booked out some place for everyone to sleep. Girl from my uni was there, we talked only a few times in the past but it was always about work and she's quite friendly to me but we hardly ever see each other because we do different courses. Everyone was pretty pissed and randomly bumped into her she was lost and annoyed, so she asked me to help her find her room. When we got there I bottled it and said "bye".

Should I have made a move? Instead i chickened out. A few hours later some guy was chatting her up and then went back to his place for you know what.

I think it was a golden opportunity for me but I dont think she was hinting at anything... She has never talked to me like that before

Any ideas?

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

22 y/o guy looking to make friends with women after obsessing about lack of for years

  • Thread Starter

short and sweet

-got bullied for being fat and my learning disability as a kid, so have had social anxiety since I was 10, and a few days ago found out I may have Aspergers

-went to an all boy's school and never socialised with girls until I was around 16

-didn't do much outtalking to girls n college due to stress/health issues

-stayed at home for uni, because studies! scholarship! RG uni! Save money! Regret it though. Trying to make friends got in the way of my studies; also struggled because I thought every lad would just want to get pissed (stereotyping much)

-I've had a girlfriend before, was fairly platonic in hindsight but we were in love. We broke up because of her family not because she didn't like me, but I also got a bit insecure and jealous of a mate of hers. It wasn't just that he was good looking and funny, it was that he had a lot of female friends, seemed very chill and laid back (something I envy because I'm a bit high-strung and have difficulty changing that) and he generally seemed more socially adjusted. More independent.

-This is when I realised, the biggest problem in my life is my social anxiety and difficulty with 'life skills', not that 'I need a girlfriend' or 'I need to get laid'. In other words, my disability was knocking my confidence.

-It's been near a year now since we broke up, I still have feelings for her and I haven't made much progress with regards to social anxiety. In fact I got a lot worse on some fronts, namely my work ethic, and now I'm unemployed :/ (but I graduated!)

I'm at risk of becoming a bitter misogynist, so before that happens I need tips on, just how to make mates with girls :)

(I should note I'm afraid of being labeled as the 'nice guy', although I'm not seeking a girlfriend I don't want to be thought of as a kid brother or something, as I have a bit of a complex from my sister treating me that way for years.

edit: sorry that's not short and sweet at all haha!
thanks :)

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

The half your age plus seven rule - for guys. Does anyone else think like this?

  • Thread Starter

Basically, a unofficial rule in dating, but one I believe in for relationships. As I get older I plan on following it closely. With my looks, I think I will maintain my peak until my early 40's, after which I will not be competitive enough in the dating market against younger guys. I am 23, that gives me a good 17-22 years of dating women who are also in their primes (their 20's), with the half plus seven rule the end of my (realistically) dating years would be 45 with which it would be acceptable to be going out with a 29 year old woman.

In terms of lifestyle I have never really drank alcohol, I don't smoke or anything like that. I follow a strict gym and diet regimen and like to take care of the skin in particular.

Why do I consider these things? Because quite simply, I enjoy being a bachelor, my biggest fear is being chained down to a life which takes away my freedom. I don't want to be one of those typical tied down family men until I am nearly an old man. I am too vain for that. I want my toys, my freedom to travel the world doing whatever I want.

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

Well I'm just lost as hell now, just looking for some advice

  • Thread Starter

Hellooo :)

hmm, finding it hard to write this but I would like an honest opinion from girls or guys i guess, on what they would think of my current situation. Never told a sole any of this. If anyone would spare a few minutes of their time and maybe give me a little bit of advice I would honestly be very grateful.

Little bit of history;

I am 26, male and completely ****** what to do with girls anymore. I stayed a virgin for a long time until I was 23 (not by choice, just gruelingly waited until I found a girl a really liked).

I was as at university and had plenty of interest by girls but just lacked confidence to do anything about it mainly because I was still a virgin and could not stand the embarrassment of people finding out (friends all had loads of partners by then). Plus at that stage I was innocent and thought the whole ONS idea was not the ideal gent i as trying to be and what i thought nice girls wanted, i probably 'turned down' 10+ ONS/F-buddy situations. Anyways I found a girl-1 i really liked eventually :D , and by that time thought '**** it' lets go for it. She was really nice and she had no idea i was a virgin. I didn't let on because i knew she had been dating since 16 and i just thought she would think less of me, despite every girl ever saying the opposite of this.


Anyways, she was finishing her course that year (non uk student) so we both knew it would be a fun fling really. After a few months of dating and both really being really into each other we eventually had sex. I felt like the king of the world, so so happy and finally felt I could respect myself. Obviously she realised I had not done it before and she said I should have told her even though she hardly believed it, which now when I think back maybe I should have. Happiest I have ever been.

3 days later she dumped me and said she was not into me anymore :( She was nice about it, but man, it hurt like a b****. I just didn't understand how someone could be so hot and cold like that, tbh I lost it. She said I was taking it too serious where as she saw it more as a fun thing, i guess that was a little true, but still it just felt cruel after so much good intension and waiting 23 years of my life to finally be lucky enough to share the experience with someone. I was not in love, neither she, but i felt we had a dam good connection. Anyways I kinda got over it (wellll not really, my heart still hit the floor whenever I saw her) but i I tried to show respect and be nice and all stay friends and all that jazz. She graduated uni, I took it on the chin as **** happens and counted myself lucky I had even experienced it all.

Soon after coming back for my final masters year i found out she ****** a few guys a few weeks after she dumped me. Well i really lost it then, she was a 'nice' girl. I hated her, still to this day i do and i don't think i ever will really let it go, but i still thought the whole 'ideal gentleman' approach was the way to find girls i really liked so after a while I felt the only way to get myself out of the dumps was to meet a nice girl again. Still rejecting the whole f-buddy, ONS stuff as I thought any girl would think less of me doing it.


So got to know another girl-2 I liked, began developing feelings and getting all the right (what i thought) signals i asked her out. She said no as she had just started dating another guy. Well god dam it I thought. So far but so close again. We remained friends, tbh really good friends and I knew she still liked me but she was with this other dude. And after having a girl **** around with other guys just after dumping me and the pain that caused me no way was I gonna still try to pursue this girl and similarly upset in the same way the guy she was seeing, just not on.

Still i lost it again, I mean seriously whats a guy got to do to just have some of the happiness everyone else seeming so easily manages. Any confidence I had just went, effectively now I was a 24 yr old that had had sex once in his life. So for the rest of my final year i had countless opportunities for casual sex but I just could not seize them because of what had happened to me, I just could not go through that again. And life's final 'F-you' occurred at the end of the year when she (girl-2) told me she really did like me and had all along and wished I had asked her out earlier. (despite her dating this other dude who she said she would have broke it off with).

Well thats just '*******' great I thought. Again me trying to be a gent and treating her with respect by not trying to 'woo' her whilst she was seeing somebody actually screwed me. Dam it i really liked her too. So being the final Uni days and having the most pathetic time with women I caved and went for what everyone seems to do. Had a ONS with a stunner tbh, seemed to go well, but still I'm pretty sure she thought hmm maybe this guy isn't the most experienced. In summary graduated a complete failure with women really and only had sex twice. bugger.

So my questions are;

1-Have I just been unfortunate with the opposite sex, or should i just 'man up' and have casual sex/flings like everyone else seems to have and forget about trying to find a real relationship. Maybe that will lift this huge storm of sexual experience inadequacy I have torturing my conscience day and night?


2-I have recently met this girl, pretty sure she likes me and I will ask her on a date soon. Though given my basically 0 sexual experience, if it eventually comes to it should I just tell her I'm a virgin? As a 26 year old male, girls what would you think if a guy said he was a virgin at this age or say I have only had tiny little bit of experience a long time ago. Im just so afraid of her rejecting me because of it. She seems nice, but so did my first. Or should I just not even mention it? I really do like this girl a hell of a lot.


Sorry for the essay friends, just had to get that of my chest to somebody just once. Again any advice or shared stories would mean a lot.

Thank you :)

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

Crush Trouble

  • Thread Starter

So there's this guy. We've been chatting for a couple of weeks and somewhat known each other for a couple more (this is vague things like answering a series of english related questions on the uni freshers fb page) and I really like him. I keep telling myself I haven't known him that long so I need to stop being stupid but I can't help it; I've never felt so- matched, in terms of a sense of humor and conversation. The fact I've always been single doesn't help. But I digress.

Next Friday I'm going round his to play 5 nights at Freddy's (long story) and I'm scared. You see, online, I seem to be decent at being quick witted and maybe even interesting. But in real life, I'm awkward and boring so I'm scared if we meet properly in person he'll stop talking to me. Help.

Side note- What I do know is he's not a psychopath on the basis my housemate used to be in one of his classes.

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

How to trust my boyfriend again with his drinking

  • Thread Starter

Me and my boyfriend are in our 3rd year of Uni
On fresher's week (late september) we both drank throughout the whole week however one night I didn't go out, he did and he didn't come back, he got paralytic, punching people and got arrested. He spent the night in a cell.

That night I was worried as he wasn't answering his phone, his hallmates came back without him, I had no idea where he was as they had just left him on his own. I had to deal with stories from them of the ridiculous amount of alcohol he consumed (10+ units from pre-drinking cider and then 20 shots in the space of 5 minutes), them finding it absolutely hilarious, laughing about how he couldn't open his eyes and didn't know where he was. And they just left him on his own.

Now the problem is I just can't trust him with alcohol anymore. Our flatmates regularly play drinking games and invite large groups of people and once I actually play I enjoy them but I always regret things I do and say. I had morals before I came to uni, now I feel like I have none as these people know every intimate detail about our lives (never have I ever... need I say more)

When he is drinking with others I just can't trust him anymore and I don't know what to do as it is ruining our relationship.

I also don't trust our hallmates and I feel that they are always going to do stupid things like during truth or dare they have to kiss someone else, give them a lapdance, ETC and I can't help thinking that if my boyfriend drinks too much he will get involved as he is very easily led.

Please help me to stop feeling like this, I know it's 100% me but I don't know how to stop these feelings :(

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

How to approach a guy you're attracted to???

  • Thread Starter

How do you start chatting to a guy who you're attracted to? For instance, at a party or some kind of social event. Like I know how to talk to people but as soon as anything remotely flirtatious/suggestive is implied I get super awkward and lose all sense of confidence.

Its kind of stupid cos I'm 20 years old and in the prime of my life. I know its natural to get nervous but I'm not a little girl with a crush any more- I'm a liberal woman who wants to get out there and meet someone worthwhile. And if I want to meet someone I need to start chatting to guys who interest me, all the while trying not to come across as awkward or too forward. How the hell do you do it?

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

Some reasons a girl hasn't had a boyfriend

  • Thread Starter

Hi, there have been a few such threads but I am still interested ... I am 21, I go out a fair share, I am active and take care of my looks and figure but I have not been in a long-term relationship so far. I have had two opportunities but for circumstances out of our control, it didn't go further than two weeks each time. If it wasn't for that, don't know what would happen. So first, what are some reasons a girl hasn't had a serious boyfriend by 21 (apart from the obvious, like not caring about looks, etc.)? Second, what should I be doing to be genuinely attractive to men (i.e. not just physically but for a long-term relationship)? What kind of personality traits do you men like in girls? I would love a relationship and think I could make a good girlfriend so any advice is appreciated. :)

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe

How do I get over these two girls?

  • Thread Starter

Like there's 2 girls that I've had feelings for but they weren't just hot but they also had such a sweet personality :love: I'm not in their league looks wise & they knew I was quite shy/awkward as well but I always felt comfortable around them. I never felt as if I was being judged by them or anything. I'm thankful they gave me a chance to interact with them aha :p

Anyway I'm more confident now & have had some great conversations with them, they're so nice, not superficial or anything. However one had a bf & the other wants kids & I don't so no relationship or anything would materialise. I think about them a lot, how to get over them, thanks? :)

IFTTT

Put the internet to work for you.

Turn off or edit this Recipe