Sex stopped in the first year of marriage. Any help?

My wife and I got married quickly but I have never loved anyone like this and can't imagine a better partner in every other way. She really is my best friend. Long story short we couldn't keep a baby because of being too poor so we had to end the pregnancy. Once we got through that there were other excuses. Our sex life has never normalized. Once every 1-2 months is about usual. To be honest I was dealing with it for well over a year but in the past few months I am getting really frustrated. We have talked about this many times. I try to talk to her about it and she gets really mad and says I am just adding pressure which makes her want it less. So I stay frustrated and then she is always asking what is wrong when I get silent. Well I don't want to talk about it and make it worse. Then she gets angry at me for lying about being ok and being a bad communicator. Damned if you do and damned if you don't right. If I do stand my ground I end up comforting her. When she feels secure she gets angry again. This all makes her sound horrible but this is the only place she is like this. She is affectionate and emotionally intimate. She has o ffered more sex but makes sure I know she is happy and is only doing it for me. She would rather be doing other things. Which hurts and feels like manipulation to be honest. In the end I just want her to see the importance of physical love and that we need to work it out. How can I get her to see this without having to threaten walking out? I don't want anybody else. I just want her to be an active engaged partner.

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