Just found out about my wife cheating

So 2 nights ago, I got up in the middle of the night because I couldn't sleep. I found my wife left her computer logged on and I've been suspicious she is cheating, so I looked and sure enough, there were emails between her and another man for about 6 months now. We live in the West Coast, he lives in the East Coast. I quickly forwarded the emails to myself and then woke her up, confronted her, and made her leave the house. We have two small children and have been married almost 11 years. I had feelings something was up for a while because her behavior changed and there was no intimacy anymore, but I chalked it up to having to deal with the kids. I work from home and she works full time and so I'm the one who handles everything with the kids. She is the primary bread winner. After kicking her out, I made her come back and stay home with the kids that day and took off. I did some research and found out the guy is married, 10 years older, and has 3 kids. I got his contact info and his wife's. I tried contacting the OM but got no response at first. I contacted his wife to let her know what was going on. I never heard back from her either, but my wife (very angrily) informed me that his wife got my message. She asked me what I wanted and I told her I don't know. She says she has fallen out of love with me and that they've only met a few times on business trips and flirted, but the last time, they kissed. I also found out that she has another business trip planned and their emails indicated they were planning on taking it to the next level. The OM actually responded back to me and said that nothing happened and that they had been talking constantly and texting/emailing constantly and that they felt like it was love, but that he's been trying to be objective and has been telling her to go back to me. (What a great guy!) My wife is saying she loves me, but is not in love anymore. She feels that I have every right to have custody of the kids if we divorce and is worried she will not be able to see the kids. She says she wants to be in love with me, but that she's not anymore and that she feels like I'm more like a brother to her than a lover. She said she thinks the best thing for her would be to stay with me, but she feels like the only reason she would be doing it is for the kids. I told her that we're so fractured now, the kids are going to pick up on it if things are the same as they've been. I asked her if she was in love with this OM and she admitted she was, but claims that even if he were not in the picture, she's been thinking about separation for a while because things have been so awkward. She cancelled the business trip today because she said she knew I would not trust her. I have gone back and forth on this and understand now that I contributed to us drifting apart emotionally and even physically, but nothing deserving of this affair. Do I walk away? Do I even try to stay married? In both cases, what do you think I should do?

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