How are we doing one year later?

Hi everyone, I'm a regular lurker and a first time poster. My wife had her latest EA starting three years ago and we came close to divorce one year ago. At the time she decided she wanted to give things one more chance, or that I should give her one more chance before we got divorced. My suggestion of divorce had caught her by surprise and really put her into a tailspin, which I didn't understand because I had done so much to try and keep us together and she only ever through that in my face. Long story short (but please ask about anything you need to know) my wife has almost always responded to the tough times in life by becoming "friends" with other men and seeking their attention. We've been together 17 years since we were teens and this has happened regularly every few years whenever the going has gotten tough. The men she has become attached to have usually pushed her buttons and moved things toward an EA, and have also attempted to become physical with her over time as well. The last time as I said started 3 years back and culminated a year ago with my accepting her attempt at R, that time being precipitated by a combination of family issues some of which were my fault and some not. So what I'd really like to know is how people think this is going for us? I have a lot that I think has gone better, but also some things that I worry are red flags. During this past year I have kept regular tabs on her with a VAR that I have moved around randomly. I have found nothing. I have also kept good tabs on her computer usage, phone/texting, emails. Nothing has come up, so that is good news. There was one work email account that I never had access to but that was discontinued long before this year of R. The good on her part includes her stepping up and being a wife again, being kind, ending her verbal and emotional abuse and avoiding men actively for the first time in our marriage. She has become involved and has led our marriage in a good way too, not just being brought along for the ride like before. Much of her superiority has ended too, no longer demanding the world from me like before. And as I said above, I have found no signs of other men looking for EA/PA from her though at least one has sought that from her. She was open with me about that. She's been open about everything and twice I've been sure I found some evidence of wrongdoing and she's shown me that no, I was the one wrong. The bad on her part are her GNO's which continue weekly though are at acceptable places, and end early. Her friends are not the best influence but are good people, I might have to explain that if anyone needs. She still reacts strongly to any struggle in life and to male attention in general but that might not ever change. Our counseling from before this year was a total botch with that counselor being almost treacherous I feel, we've avoided it since. Mainly my worries are that her long time pattern of behavior will return, and that also despite saying she is sorry she also feels that I "scapegoat" her and overstate everything that has happened. So does anyone have any advice or a sense of how we are doing? Did I leave important things out? I feel like we're on the verge of being better but I also have a real fear that it's all false and that I'm doing the wrong thing. I also still become very very angry at times and then sad, but these times have been fewer and further between a year later. But I also acknowledge her progress and feel like if she was full of it I'd have seen it by now, especially as closely as I've been keeping track of things. Is this possibly going well?

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