Did I just get rejected? (girl)

Okay. So I just came back home after a couple of drinks. Yes, at 12 oclock. I went out with my old work colleagues at 5pm for a catch up. There was only 6 of us but it soon dwindled to three. I happened to be quite attracted to one of the guys. He's about 8 years older than me and I felt like if I ever said I liked him he wouldn't be interested. Anyway, as the group dwinled to three it was me left with the guy I like, lets call him B, and an older work colleague who was quite drunk - J. We were deciding whether we should go home or not. B had said much earlier in the day that he was going to go back to his flat and clean his room, but everyone took the piss of that so he stayed out later. So B decided eventually that he'd go back to his flat, as he had a laptop with him and didn't want to carry it home to late. He said that he'd be back out later after dropping off his stuff if we were still in town. So B leaves and quickly after, me and J decided to leave. I stopped with J at a bus stop and we were just saying goodbye. I randomly blurted out that I liked J, and was embarrassed about what happened that night. The three of us had been talking about chatting people up, and J who was very drunk wanted me to practice my chatting up skills on him. (all as a joke ofc). Then he's like na, practice on B (the guy I like). And then he went on to compliment B in a very corny way saying he was very handsome and intelligent and articulate bla bla bla, imagine he is the man of your dreams etc. And it was all a joke but I was so embarrassed because I secretly did want to chat him up. :$ Again, anyway. I randomly blurted out I liked this guy. So J was like, oh do you want me to say "Hello" to him from you? And I asked what he meant by that. Then he said that he'd give the guy my number. And I was like "hoo no!" - because I felt like that guy would not like me at all with his age and everything else. Then horror of all horrors, the guy I liked appears as I was talking about him! He had mentioned he was hungry earlier and he came out subway and stopped by us. Then J suggested that me and B should go out for a drink together, alone (this night, not a schedule for another night). Now that felt like some sort of hint. But the guy I liked was like "Nah, I gotta get home" - which was fair enough - because he had mentioned that earlier. But in a way it felt like a rejection to be alone with me. It most likely is. Its just I'm a very shy girl and I've never been the one to say I like someone. I have self esteem issues and I don't feel worth asking people out! So I don't know. Do you think the guy I liked rejected me? Was the refusal to have a drink with me a rejection, or not because he was intending to go home anyway? Sorry if that sounded a bit rambled. I hope it wasn't and I'd REALLY appreciate if someone helped me with this. Like there's no one for me to speak to right now and I just feel so embarrassed and down. :(

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