| Sorry for the really long post but I am in a bit of a dilemma. Only serious answers please... Almost 2 weeks ago now my boyfriend broke up with me over something very, very stupid. 2 days before we broke up he was telling me how much he loves me, how he wants to be with me forever, nice things like that. We were so happy. Then he broke up with me (like I said over something stupid and not necessarily worthy to break up over) and he said some horrible things to me like he doesn't love me anymore, his feelings have been fading for a long time, he doesn't want me, I don't make him happy, etc. This has hurt me a lot because we have been together for almost 2 and a half years. I struggled a lot in the first week of the break up, I wasn't eating or sleeping well and was so sad, crying non stop all the time. He means everything to me. I feel so lonely and empty, I can't bear the thought of not being with him anymore. Anyway, I spoke to my friends about him and they said that I shouldn't talk to him, he should contact me first because he is acting as if he doesn't care. So for 2 weeks now, I have not heard from him at all. On Monday, I saw him on the way to college and I suddenly felt very anxious, I was shaking and my chest was all tight. He seemed completely fine. This obviously hurt me a lot. I was longing for a text or a phone call from him, anything that would tell me whether he cared or not, if he was sad too, but I heard nothing and still haven't. I know that he loves me, I just know it. He has said so many nice things to me about how much he loves me and I trust him so much, the things he said to me just 2 days before the break up felt so real and I know he meant them. However, the day before we broke up he did tell me he was feeling very stressed because of his exams and so I'm putting the break up down to the fact that he probably reached boiling point and just got so stressed and worked up about it, that's why we broke up over something silly. His sister came round on Monday to collect some of this things that he had left at mine and I asked her how he was and she said he doesn't seem to care really, he just seems very stressed and concentrating on his exams, all he talks about is his exams and stuff. So again this is leading me to believe he done it out of stress. Then his dad called me because we have quite a close relationship and he has told both me and my mum how he thinks I'm the perfect girlfriend for his son, he thinks he is being stupid for the way he is acting, he is a fool for leaving me, I'm good for him, he believes his son will never find anyone as good as me. This was reassuring to hear because then all the things I was saying to myself such as how I know he loves me and stuff were kind of proved right because even his dad said so if you know what I mean. Anyway, his last exam was yesterday and I was wondering whether I should go and talk to him now that he no longer has any stress going on. I'm a bit torn though because I feel as though it hasn't been long enough. I just need to talk to him for closure because I feel that I have been sitting here and waiting for him to talk to me for 2 weeks now and I haven't heard from him and I just feel stupid for almost wasting my time so I would rather swallow my pride and just go and talk to him. However, I am always the one to sort out our problems and I almost feel as though he is expecting me to again? The reason I feel like talking to him today is because Friday's were always our day to spend quality time together after a long week at college and just chill out and stuff. I am one of those people that believes everything happens for a reason and I believe that this has happened because I have learnt so much from it. During the last 2 weeks I have spend time reflecting and I have learnt that I need to spend more time with my friends because literally I would always be with my boyfriend and now we are apart I feel almost as though I have no one to talk to because it'll be like I'm using my friends kind of thing. So I have learnt that I need to improve on that. Also I have learnt that spending all of my time with him is not healthy because we don't look forward to the time we see each other and stuff. Also I have started work on a CV which I am going to hand around to everyone tomorrow and I have secured an interview to become a maths tutor for GCSE students. As I said above I believe everything happens for a reason and I feel that this has happened because I needed time to reflect on my life and future prospects. Now I have done that and I am sorting myself out I feel like now would be a good time to talk to him. If we do get back together I believe we will have a better relationship because I feel like I have grown a bit whilst being apart from him. I will hopefully be working as a maths tutor in my spare time as well as having a Saturday job and spending more time with my friends, making the time that we do spend together more happier and healthier because we won't be arguing over silly little things. Anyway, I just don't feel like I can wait any longer, I hate sitting here like a lemon praying for a text so I might as well just go and sort it out right, it has been 2 weeks, its not like its been 2 days. Besides, what do I really have to lose? :S | |||
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