Need Help Moving On

I'm in a fairly difficult situation where I think I just need a few suggestions on how to make the logistics of separation and/or divorce work. My wife and I have been married for over 11 years and have 4 kids with each other, ranging from 10 years old to 18 months old. Throughout the marriage (and a lot of this has been looking back on things after the big event), there has been a lot of verbal abuse going both directions. Things like yelling and telling each other what they should be doing. This led to a lack of trust and then to a lack of communication. I would end the yelling matches by taking a time out and not coming back to it for days, when it was already too late to address the issue. This was bad, I know now. Anyway, after a few physical affairs and, I suspect, a couple of emotional ones as well, all over the course of about 6 years, she has demanded a separation. Upon discussion (weeks) she actually wants a divorce in the end as well. I am trying MC, but end up going by myself most of the time. It has helped me to see the mistakes I made during the marriage, and I have changed many of the things that I feel contributed to the problems. She has not been invested in trying, though, as she has been detaching over the space of the 6 years and has now "reached closure" as she describes it. I'm not changing for her, although I have hoped that she changes her mind. I am changing because I know the attitudes and actions that I have taken would be damaging to any family dynamic, and that they need to be changed. I am willing to discuss some of those actions if they seem relevant. At this point, however, I am stuck. I want to move out, but I also want to retain joint custody of my children. Ideally, I want 50% custody, but I work about an hour away from home in a job that doesn't have very flexible hours. 1st problem is that we had some credit problems last year due to some medical bills that weren't paid and went to collections. I think they're still in collections, so I understand that we could probably get those "taken care of" with the proper agreements with the agencies. However, that has prevented me from finding an apartment, so I don't think I have anywhere to move to without going back to live with my parents. Since I work an hour away from where we live right now, I would also need to get day care for 4 kids, 2 of which are in grade school, with the 3rd starting this fall. Is having 4 kids in day care (2 in all-day and 2 in after-school) even feasible? What are some ways to repair credit enough to find a place to live? I know I need to get out, but fulfill my parental responsibility, but I cannot seem to figure out how to get out to give the space that is needed to progress in any direction in my situation.

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