stuck with a married woman

This is a terrible situation in which much lesson has been learnt, and but easy to condemn people when you are not in their shoes. Been having an affair with a lady for the past three years, It started as friendship at uni, but things just developed out of control, in which we feel a sense of mutual love(maybe an illusion of it). This young lady of then 22 was married to a man 19 years older than her(a divorcee with three teenagers). She is from another country, so her visa status kinda depends on her marriage(which is understandable to me). She was genuinely not happy about her situation as I thought "she became a victim as a result of her desperation to stay in a richer country for a better life(something like slavery)", coupled with the fact that the man had spends money on the girls family back at home as well. No child is involved in the marriage now, her status in the country is now free from the marriage, but she wouldn't leave this man even though she hurts badly(in Africa, woman can't just leave their men for some cultural reasons, but she can't be loyal ). I wouldn't fault this man(even though he has his flaws like many people) in anyway because I have probably heard just one side of a story. Three years together with this lady has made me helpless, several attempts to break away, but she kinda knows the button to press in me to calm me down, and I fall for the **** and feel unable to make the 'right' decision. She even gets annoyed a the slightest suspicion of me being with another lady. My seemingly 'irrational' plan is to confess to her husband, but timing it in such that nobody gets physically hurt. We may break even by that and live our lives in honesty as secrecy kills the soul so terribly. There is no amicable way to stopping this, it wouldn't just work! I welcome bashing of all sorts but be reasonable. It is a real life situation.

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