I feel a bit low. I feel alone.

Hello! I'm 20 years of age and a guy. I'm on a foundation degree course which finishes this Summer. It's a small group so we all get on well and it's just a really nice group, but we only ever see eachother during lesson time. Everyone but two of us lives at home still and have jobs and stuff. I'm not really a go out to a night club person, but just doing something outside of lessons would be nice. At the end of the course, we're all going for a meal or on a trip somewhere which is nice, but I'm worried after it's ended, the friendship will too. I'm worried i'll be alone. I work on the weekends in retail. Everyone who works in the store are really friendly, helpful and pleasant, and it's nice to chat to everyone, but after this course, i'm worried I won't really have any friends. Everyone from secondary school went off doing other things and are now at Uni too. I've never had a girlfriend either. I'm just too shy and was always told girls like taller guys. I'd like someone shorter than me, but i'm 5'8". I'm not confident. I keep fit by cycling and I walk loads but not wearing a shirt, i look chubby. I've lost weight and will carry on trying to get slimmer but that puts my confidence down a bit too. I've been told i'm funny and "handsome" and I think i'm a nice person, but I just feel really young too. Like I see loads of dudes at Uni who all look older, muscle, and they're about 6 foot. There's me, 5'8 and scrawny ish. I'd go to the gym, but have no one to go with. I look about 15 too and because of that, I've no confidence. The course is taught at a college. With 2 others once, I went up to work in the Uni library. It just felt grown up and totally different. It felt like I wasn't ready. How can I make myself feel more confident? I'd like to be able to laugh with a girl, go on a bike ride with someone special to me, make her laugh with my awful singing, go to a cinema, have my first kiss... My friends all have someone. They all have a picture on their phone wallpapers of them together. They've got someone to call or text at 2am to say they love them. They kiss them when we're all stood at the bus stop too. When they do it kinda breaks me inside a bit. I'm not jealous, I just don't want to be alone. I'm worried i'm going to end up being one of these people on the news where they don't have anyone left when they die, with funerals of nice strangers who come along. I've never drank alcohol either. I'm 20 and have never had anyone to get tipsy with aha. My Mum asks me why I don't learn to drive. Thing is, it's cheaper to get the bus, and I don't really have anywhere to drive to. Not on my own anyway! I want someone :( I hate being on my own. I live with my Mum and Sister (my sister seems to dislike me... I recan it's because she's always going out and i'm not so we can't really relate), my Mum has someone (my Mum & Dad split)... all that leaves me with, is sitting with the cats! How can I get there? No one is interested in me. P.S. Sorry for the length of this post!

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