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My Family doesn't care about me. No one does.

I don't have any friends only my boyfriend who still gets annoyed with me because of my anxiety and stuff.

I feel like my family don't care about me at all. My parents never ring me when I am away from home which is most of the time at the moment. They never seem to talk to me much either.If I ask them about it they say they do care about me bu it doesn't seem like they do. They find me difficult I think because of my depression and stuff.Even when I explain that I need help and stuff they don't care or try to help me. I have especially become distant from my Dad which is sad cos I am his only daughter I though he would care about me more. We used to be a lot more close. I know it's partly because I come from a big family.

I have five brother ages 24, 23, 18, 13 and 8 and none of them care bout me. The youngest two are okay but I'm not close to them. But the oldest three I am not close to at all. They never talk to me or ask how I am. I get sad because I would have though they would care about me being the only girl and everything. My eldest brother has Aspergers and so hes maybe an exception but the other two arn't.

I'm not close to my grandparents or to the rest of my family.

I had two close friends but one moved away and now wont contact me and the other stopped being friends with me when she found out i liked her and she liked me.Anyone else I am not close to. I have no one at uni or anywhere. People that I talk to but am not close to. Don't get on with my roomate in Austria. I have few people I talk to online but not really close to any of them.
There was also one girl online who I met up with bu she said she couldnt be friends with me cos she thought that i was too depressed and thats not what a friend should be.

Even my boyfriend gets annoyed with me and can't put up with me sometimes.

My social anxiety and depression are getting worse. Havn't been out for quite a few days or seen anyone except my bf. I don't think I will manage going back to Austria in March again or continuing with the TA band I'm in. I worry about the anxiety and depression stopping me in the future. It makes me feel unmotivated and scared about going out. Also i think everyone hates me.I think whats the point of doing stuff as well when I have no friends.

I have no one and feel like I can't cope with life and doing stuff I am meant to and being around people anymore.I always think people are staring at me. I don't have even one female friend either. Girls just look at me meanly.

Ready to give up and become a hermit in a remote place. It's easier but at the same time I need love and care and attention. Feels like no one would care if I was dead.Just been in flat all day for last week pretty much and I get so scared and lonely.

Like I said I have no friends at Uni in Austria or Nottingham. Most people at University have atleast one or two friends but I don't have a single one. I don't know why I am always polite but people don't seem interested in becoming closer friends with me :( I suppose being asexual makes me weird too. I don't fit in woth most students as I don't drink really or want sex e.t.c.

I could write a lot more but Don't want the post to be long. I suppose I am just crying out for help really :(




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