| I'm a 23 year old guy, and never really done anything with a girl. I haven't kissed or ever had sex with a girl but I have fooled around a little bit with a friend (like touching and 'outercourse'). Im am obviously conscious and worried about being so inexperienced cos of my age, and considering there are 14 year olds who have done more than me. It gets quite frustrating :(. I am quite a nervous person, and don't have much confidence in myself and am really rubbish at flirting. I can flirt for a bit but have no idea how to take anything further. I guess i worry to much about what a girl would think after a few dates and they expect you to kiss them and perhaps more and i would have no idea what to do. I do know that girls can tell if a guy's not experienced from how they talk and what they say, body language etc, so if they want to go out with me they will probably know anyway. Like I made a huge mistake when i was living in sweden on my own for a bit when i was 18. I was really frendly with a group of people, and there was a 21 year old medical student who I liked. We got on really really welll for weeks and always made each other laugh, could talk about anything. It was like there was a weird connection. Also, she was beautiful. Had white blonde hair (natural) and intense blue eyes. I walked her home one night cos it was late after going for drinks with friends and she asked me into her apartment. I said no and that I should proably go cos I dont want to impose. She asked if i wanted to come in and said it was cool like 9 times. I knew what that meant but i was honestly terrified. I thought she would laugh at me cos I had never kissed or anything, even though she probably knew anyway. So I went back to my apartment. I dont know why I did! I still kick myself about this cos she was the nicest girl in the world. Idiot! I have never formally been on a date but I have been out with girls who thought we were on a date cos I had asked them if they wanted to get a drink/coffee etc. I just never realise its a date. I realise like 2 weeks later thats what it was and then go '****, what an idiot'. Plus if someone is obviously into me I get really nervous and if they like that, and keep talking to me and stuff, I get even more nervous and kind of run away. Stupid I know. Its like I have no control of it at the time. I never got anyone in Uni cos of this and I tink people started to figure it out so I got really embarrased and kept myself to myself. Im like this for a few reasons, I used to really fat, got bullied quite badly and didnt have the happiest home life. But I lost all the weight etc. when I was 18 and got a good degree and tried to move on. Also, people say I'm really attractive and some say that I'm really beautiful and could be a model and stuff. I guess I had ugly duckling syndrome or something. But if they think Im attractive, why won't they try anything, unless they really are and i just dont notice which could be the reason. People have said that to me before when someone has been really into me. Basically I want to know how to take things further without worrying so much and how to stop hiding things and being ashamed of things. Im like 6ft 1, blonde hair, blue eyes, broad and do a lot of exercise. I guess I look quite nordic really. Plus I also think I'm bi, cos I find guys attractive too and would want to try some stuff. What would you guys think if you met someone like this, would it be a turn off, would it not matter, or would it be a turn on or would you simply not care. If you liked me you liked me and thats that. Or would you probably figure it out and just work with it. Plus would the confidence thing bother you? I am working on it, and being much more sociable but it takes time obviously. Plus i would never say I was lacking experience when i first met someone obviously, but it would come up eventually when it came to lissing and stuff. I would like to have a relationship, cos I'm pretty funny when you get to know me and quite loud and fun. Plus im really accepting and easy going and I think I have a lot of love to give someone. Thanks for your advice guys (sorry for the long question), plus I hope this helps any other guys in my situation or similar :) | |||
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