This is a very simple question
If there IS sex, but not enough, and when it happens it's just BAD, but the rest of the marriage is pretty good...do people stay?
What? How can sex be bad and rest of marriage be good? Of course it can happen. You try to forget about the unsatisfied needs for a while, talk about kids, talk about finances, talk about the sprinklers, and actually have laughs because after all you have spent almost 30 yrs with this person in your life.
Oh, how can sex be bad? Well, its' the subtle things
(1) unmatched needs, me being HD and H being LD
(2) However, I am the ultimatum crockpot. So I almost beg him to slow down so I can reach there, but he doesn't slow down. Quickly finishes so I am left hanging. I know he tries sometimes, and I sometimes smile and say "can we do another one later" because with the anticipation and warm-up I MIGHT get there more easily. Well, the follow-up rarely happens (why? I don't know, he can't do it, not in the mood, distracted by other things)
I have never had a PIV orgasm. Can I orgasm? Oh man, I know I can have multiples, these days when I try to comfort myself I can come several times in an afternoon. It's ridiculous.
(3) I recently cut waist-length hair. When people ask me why I say "oh too much trouble". In 20 years I have said Nx100 times "please don't pull on my hair" (when he's on me and just puts elbows on either side), "please don't put all your weight on me"(155 lbs vs 110 lbs), but he said I was "too picky" and I eventually stopped. Pain and discomfort definitely stop a woman from having any pleasure.
(4) It used to be in the middle of the night, he would just grab me, put my head down there implying a BJ. This REALLY pisses me off. I love giving BJ, but not when someone yanks my head and stuffs it down there. I love to do it in the heat of the moment, not when I am half awake with a dry mouth.
There are many, many little details. Have I tried to communicate? OH YOU BET. You bet.
If there IS sex, but not enough, and when it happens it's just BAD, but the rest of the marriage is pretty good...do people stay?
What? How can sex be bad and rest of marriage be good? Of course it can happen. You try to forget about the unsatisfied needs for a while, talk about kids, talk about finances, talk about the sprinklers, and actually have laughs because after all you have spent almost 30 yrs with this person in your life.
Oh, how can sex be bad? Well, its' the subtle things
(1) unmatched needs, me being HD and H being LD
(2) However, I am the ultimatum crockpot. So I almost beg him to slow down so I can reach there, but he doesn't slow down. Quickly finishes so I am left hanging. I know he tries sometimes, and I sometimes smile and say "can we do another one later" because with the anticipation and warm-up I MIGHT get there more easily. Well, the follow-up rarely happens (why? I don't know, he can't do it, not in the mood, distracted by other things)
I have never had a PIV orgasm. Can I orgasm? Oh man, I know I can have multiples, these days when I try to comfort myself I can come several times in an afternoon. It's ridiculous.
(3) I recently cut waist-length hair. When people ask me why I say "oh too much trouble". In 20 years I have said Nx100 times "please don't pull on my hair" (when he's on me and just puts elbows on either side), "please don't put all your weight on me"(155 lbs vs 110 lbs), but he said I was "too picky" and I eventually stopped. Pain and discomfort definitely stop a woman from having any pleasure.
(4) It used to be in the middle of the night, he would just grab me, put my head down there implying a BJ. This REALLY pisses me off. I love giving BJ, but not when someone yanks my head and stuffs it down there. I love to do it in the heat of the moment, not when I am half awake with a dry mouth.
There are many, many little details. Have I tried to communicate? OH YOU BET. You bet.
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