we have only just begun .. one MC session under our belts last week, problems revealed and discussed .. pretty much feel this is our last ditch effort
due to scheduling conflicts, we couldn't get a session in this week but each have an IC session with our therapist next week before we go back to another joint session
i have another thread in Reconciliation that talks about what's going on right now with our marriage .. shortened version, i got the ILYBNILWY from H and here we are .. we know how we got here, trying to figure out if we can get back
my gut tells me that there is potentially an EA going on with my H, deleted texts, secrecy, hiding things .. i have no real proof except that i know of deleted texts bc of examining phone records and snooping on his phone and the texts are gone .. i have been informed of the ways to recover but almost virtually impossible to have the time to retrieve from his phone bc he pretty much has it on him 24/7; i know of the VAR, still not sure about this either; without the concrete evidence, how can i confront H?
have told my H i became very uncomfortable with this friendship with this OW coworker and that i felt he was being very secretive about her .. he told me he could tell after he had come back from a business trip with her and others that i was pissed so that is why he just kind of never forced anything about her on me .. i made the comment that i felt he was possibly getting his emotional needs from her that he wasn't getting from me, but, that conversation never really went any further .. he may or may not know i have been snooping, no clue, but as recent as the night we talked about it, all previous texts from her have been deleted .. never have i found anything really mind shattering, mostly work related, blah blah, but, the few texts that i know were deleted before i saw them, obviously they could have been inappropriate
what i am getting at, do i bring up my concerns about the EA in my IC with our therapist? i am very uneasy about their friendship and in ways do believe that H may not realize that is what's going on, but, he does realize that his "friendship" with her could be damaging our marriage
due to scheduling conflicts, we couldn't get a session in this week but each have an IC session with our therapist next week before we go back to another joint session
i have another thread in Reconciliation that talks about what's going on right now with our marriage .. shortened version, i got the ILYBNILWY from H and here we are .. we know how we got here, trying to figure out if we can get back
my gut tells me that there is potentially an EA going on with my H, deleted texts, secrecy, hiding things .. i have no real proof except that i know of deleted texts bc of examining phone records and snooping on his phone and the texts are gone .. i have been informed of the ways to recover but almost virtually impossible to have the time to retrieve from his phone bc he pretty much has it on him 24/7; i know of the VAR, still not sure about this either; without the concrete evidence, how can i confront H?
have told my H i became very uncomfortable with this friendship with this OW coworker and that i felt he was being very secretive about her .. he told me he could tell after he had come back from a business trip with her and others that i was pissed so that is why he just kind of never forced anything about her on me .. i made the comment that i felt he was possibly getting his emotional needs from her that he wasn't getting from me, but, that conversation never really went any further .. he may or may not know i have been snooping, no clue, but as recent as the night we talked about it, all previous texts from her have been deleted .. never have i found anything really mind shattering, mostly work related, blah blah, but, the few texts that i know were deleted before i saw them, obviously they could have been inappropriate
what i am getting at, do i bring up my concerns about the EA in my IC with our therapist? i am very uneasy about their friendship and in ways do believe that H may not realize that is what's going on, but, he does realize that his "friendship" with her could be damaging our marriage
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