I have been married 9 years and am in my late 30's. I have a strong sex drive. Its somehow resurfaced after years of low libido due to having 3 young kids close together. But now its back and I have no desire for my husband. I physically shudder when he touches me. I'm repulsed. We've never ever had a passionate sexual relationship to begin with but it was tolerable. I foolishly believed when I married it didn't really matter because when I met him sex wasn't a big deal or priority in my life. My aversion is part because of his habits (always in his grubby work clothes, only brushes teeth once a day, picks nose and puts it in his mouth when he thinks I don't see, farting and burping and not trying to conceal it ever and actually finding it humourous) but alot of it is due to my resentments. I'm in counselling, trying to work through, he will not go to marital or individual I've asked several times over the past 5 years or so. Right now, I reject him frequ ently till he starts acting like a clingy pawy desperate teenager and then I give in so he will get away from me again. I just lie there and never inititate but yet he still comes back for more! how do I tell someone you don't wanna have sex with them anymore?? its hurtful?? I know what I'm doing is wrong, giving in on occasion but I feel it keeps things semi normal around here and I don't want to hurt him saying I don't want it anymore. What do I do? is there any hope for us at all?
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