First time posting. I'll try to keep this as brief as possible and convey my dilemma.
I left my wife 9 years ago and we divorced shortly thereafter. I have a daughter-14 and a son-11. My relationship with my ex-wife has varied over the years from almost civil to highly contentious with most of our history being at least somewhat contentious.
I'm not claiming to be perfect. I most certainly am not. However, discussions with her seem impossible. I called her a hypocrite in the title and I truly believe that description fits but I'd really appreciate replies especially if you think I'm missing something.
First, a few recent examples of the hypocrisy.
1) She tells my children I am a bad father and a bad person that is not going to heaven. I have never uttered anything harmful like that about her ever. Yet, she tells the children and me that I am jerk and I am awful to her.
2) She has not worked in 7 years instead moving her and my children in with her boyfriend for 4 years until recently breaking up. I lost my job last year and was out of work for 6 months. I used some of that time to travel when I didn't have the kids. She told my daughter, " doesn't this guy ever work?"
3) She has lived in 5 homes since 2007 and moved the kids school 4 times. This last time she was going to move close to me. We toured the school with the children and we agreed on a school. 3 months later she moved to a house even farther away and enrolled the children in school by her without consulting me and making the children promise not to tell me anything. My son told me anyway and I confronted her. I told her I was taking her to court to stop this. She told my kids, "See what I have to live with."
4) 2 nights ago she asked me what time I was getting back from out of town with kids for the 3 day weekend. I told her she could come get the kids at 7 pm. She got angry that that would waste her whole day and that it would have to be earlier. But its my weekend and my holiday with the kids. She blasted me to my daughter about what a jerk I am but all I said was that it was my day.
I am taking her to court and I think I have a real case but I still don't know how to get past the hypocrisy and denigrating comments she makes to my children. There are many many more examples of her hypocrisy. Some of them are far more extreme than what I've written here. My problem is that I don't know how to deal with this. I've tried to limit my communication with her and that helps some but as soon as she doesn't get her way, she blasts me to the kids.
Any suggestions?
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