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What do women really look for?

The age old question... Is it money? Is it power? Here is what women really look for in a true "Alpha-Male" : (None of these things is necessarily a "Game Over" if you don't have them, however, each of them matters and builds up to one main, overall, attractive person. If you focus on improving these aspects of your life, you will not only find yourself to be more attractive... But you will find better success in other aspects of your life.)

1. CONFIDENCE- You hear this all the time… women love confidence. Well, its true. But what does that mean? A man who is confident in himself will not give into her tricks and doesn't care what type of negative comments people are throwing at him because of the man he is. Women like to test a man's frame to see how his INNER confidence is. Pumping up your chest or dressing like you are a billionaire will not show a woman that you are confident. Be relaxed. Chilled out. Keep your arms by your sides. If you want to build up your confidence levels, your competence levels must rise first. This will come from real life experience… There is no book, video, post, or psychic who can put you under some type of hypnosis that will all the sudden make you more COMPETENT. Going 100 miles per hour on a Hayabusa, would you rather have confidence (according to Wikipedia: a state of being certain either that a hypothesis or prediction is correct or that a chosen course of action is the best or most effective) or competence (according to dictionary.com: possession of required skill, knowledge, qualification, or capacity)? Treat women the same way you would the bike and you will be successful instead of falling on your face.

2. FUNNY- There is a HUGE different between someone who is funny and someone who is a clown. Essentially, women want a man that they can feel comfortable with. There are quite few different theories about how laughter creates comfort and quite honestly, most of them have been proven true. If you can make a woman laugh she will generally feel more comfortable with you.

3. SOCIAL INTUITION- The guy who can always find his way through the crowd. He is always aware of his surrounding and in complete control of his actions. He can allow himself to be comfortable in any situation be it a crowded night club or his own living room. Having this trait will ultimately show that you are a confident person. If you and her were 300 miles from home and your car broke down, you have no tools, will you be able to find someone to fix the car and get her home safely? That's what is going through her mind and if you want the best women, that's what should be going through yours too.

4. HEALTH- Health does not mean that your abs have abs and you have basketballs where your shoulders are supposed to be. It is a shame that some men can not figure this out but make sure you are CLEAN. Shower every day, at least once a day, brush your teeth, wash your face, shave, floss, make sure your clothes are clean and all beat up… If you want a desirable WOMAN, it's time to MAN up and do this shit. Don't be afraid of feeling "feminine" because you "wash your face." The definition of insanity is repeating the same thing and expecting a different result. Many women say that they would give a guy more of an opportunity to talk if they would clean themselves up a bit. Try it.

5. STATUS- Meaning power. Whose the boss? Is it you? or does somebody else make your decisions for you? That's what she wants to know. Women have always wanted the man who is in control, the leader. They want the guy who IS the event and everybody wants to get to know.

6. WEALTH- Wealth does not necessarily mean money, it means access to different resources and a skill set that will be able to support her and her offspring. They want someone who has goals and ambition. Like I said, logically, women don't need a man to support her in today's society. But emotionally, that is what they seek. Money actually doesn't mean much to a woman once you have established the attraction between the two of you if its just MONEY.

7. PRE-SELECTED BY OTHER WOMEN- This is very simple. Women want what they can't have and what other women do have. There is an experiment that was done that scientists had placed a male penguin among several female penguins and none of them would come close to him. Then, the scientist placed a stuffed female penguin next to the male penguin, then all the female penguins started to move towards the one male. People are the same way. If you want the queen, you have to show her that you can have any princess you want first.




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Simple Steps for men to Developing Your Relationship Skills

1. Build a Game Plan for Yourself- Having a plan when approaching anything that is difficult to understand in your life will guarantee you better results than if you were to have no plan at all. Think about if the Bears (da Bears to be correct) hit the field without having a play called. It would be a COMPLETE DISASTER! If you have been struggling with women for some time now, this will be your first step to success. We offer individualized training sessions that will help you build a strategy that is tailored to you!
2. Get Out of Your House- The hardest thing for some men to do is simply GET OUT OF THEIR HOUSE! Practice makes perfect. Read All the books and blogs you want, but until you get out there where the action is at and practice your skills, you wont see any improvement. "In order to get quality vag, you have to go out and hunt for it."
3. Stop Being a Pussy- You heard me. Beautiful women are NOT big scary monsters. If a woman is staring you down from across the bar, guess what? SHE WANTS YOU TO COME TALK TO HER! Now the question is, how are you going to do it. Hopefully you have a game plan of what you are going to say, how you are going to act, a guess on how she is going to act… it can get overwhelming. But we can help.
4. Focus on Self-Improvement- Set goals for yourself. Create a journal of openers and routines that you used that worked and didn't work. If you keep improving your skills, you will meet better quality women, which will ultimately allow you to live a better quality life.
5. Don't give up- Don't fear rejection. Expect it. People say "no" sometimes. A lot actually… Don't give up because something didn't work once. A good coach will run a play 10 times in different ways to see if he can develop a different type of outcome from the play. Trying something once and failing means your a failure. Trying something 10 times and failing all 10 times, means you learned that it doesn't work. Be smart.




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5 tips for texting women

1. Avoid it!- That's correct. Avoid text messaging as much as possible when you first meet a woman! Yes, girls do play the texting game however, are you simply trying to become their new texting buddy? Probably not. It is very easy to send the wrong type of emotions via text message and if you should happen to screw up, it does not give you any chance to recover. Send means send.
2. Have a purpose- Text messages that simply say "Hey!" or "whats up?" are BORING! Logically think to yourself, if you spent 20 minutes talking to some stranger at a bar, and now they are texting you a day later asking what you are doing… Who are they to ask? Why would you even respond? That is what she is thinking too.
3. Slow replies are the best replies- Women don't want someone who's whole world revolves around them. If you are sitting there responding to her text messages as she sends them, you really aren't showing that you have too much going in your life. Why would she want anything to do with you?
4. Keep it playful- Avoid any type of serious or logical conversation with a woman via text message. The emotions will come off as too serious and she will instantly be turned off.
5. Play the "Waiting Game"- Don't keep sending her text, after text, after text hoping she will respond to a different question or comment! Remember, if she likes you (Which she should if you have her phone number)… She is trying not to screw things up for herself and wants to impress you too! By "bothering" her, you are simply going to turn her away from you.




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“I’m not good looking enough to be with a beautiful woman…”

Understand this, looks really don't matter. With modern day science (and I don't mean surgery… I'm talking about some simple products from Walgreens.) there aren't too many guys out there who can not clean them selves up and look halfway decent in public. Shower daily, wash your face, brush your teeth… Simply, grow up. Learn how to put together a decent outfit that works for you and get some new clothes. You don't have to look like you are rich, just don't look like a bum. If you are balding and you don't like it, shave your head. If you think you are too fat or too skinny, hit the gym and get on a diet that works for you. Consciously base your self esteem and inner confidence level on things other than women's approval!
Because that is what truly attracts a woman… A good self-esteem and confidence. Be comfortable in your own skin and if you don't like something about yourself, change it. In order for a woman to be happy with you, she has to see that you are happy with yourself too. Women are very emotional creatures and can catch onto the fact that you are insecure about yourself almost immediately. If you are positive about yourself, you will give off a positive vibe, and women will respond positively to you.
The Theory of Perception plays very heavily into self-esteem and self confidence. Perception involves making a decision about something based on our best guess of what we see. How does that relate to dealing with women? When you look in the mirror, if you see someone who is not confident in themselves, that is exactly what you are looking at. Look at yourself as an individual who DESERVES better quality women and that is what you will become.




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South-Asian guys dating Black girls; your views?

The title is pretty self explanatory.

The reason why I asked is because I am a 16 year old black female Londoner, and was certain I didn't discriminate when it came to ethnicity and dating, but I never really saw myself with a South Asian guy, so I suppose I unconsciously dismissed them.
This is was all before I had work experience in the hospital for three days, and met this AMAZING Indian doctor who I absolutely fell head over heels for. He was so charismatic, bright, considering, caring, intelligent; the list goes on. And most importantly, he was an amazing doctor. And suddenly, more and more Asian guys are becoming more attractive to me, *surprisingly*.

So, in other words; if you are a South-Asian guy, would you consider dating a black girl? If you're not, have you ever witness such couples?

Thanks guys :H




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I think I'm gay

Hi all,

So I am at a real point of well confusion. I am 24 and for all my life well I have only dated/been with girls. Since breaking up with my ex (4-5 months back) I have started to see things differently, noticing well.....guys. I work with a guy who is gay, has a partner but I fancy him, I can't help it I think he is great. I just don't know what to do.

Any help guys & girls




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Confidence/flirting

I see the world confidence plastered everywhere when it comes to attracting girls, but I don't really know what that means. What am I supposed to be confident at? I assume it's something to do with chatting up girls but I don't really know. Getting up on stage and singing karaoke in front of everyone? It seems a really generic thing to say.

So, whatever it is, how does someone get this confidence? I mean, I don't have any confidence in attracting girls because I've never had any success in it. Why would I be confident? If you asked me to name football players or do something I'm good at then I'd be very confident in my ability to do so. But chatting up girls? No, why would I be?

Then we come on to the flirting bit. I assume people will say something along the lines of "practice and keep trying", as that's how you get good at other things, but I don't really understand how to flirt. I haven't the slightest clue what you're supposed to do. I find it difficult enough to just hold a normal conversation with people, so somehow implying I'm sexually interested in them seems way out of my depth.

To try and clarify the situation a bit, I kinda feel I'm at the point where this confidence is unobtainable. I'm only 21 but I've never had a girlfriend or done anything with a girl, so they're basically aliens to me. I hadn't even had a friend that was a girl til like 17-18 and I've never had a close friend that's a girl. It's a bit tiresome being stuck in such a foreveralone position and I'd like to do something about it, but I'm really confused as to what to do, so any help would be appreciated! If you have any questions then please quote me :)




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Accepting the fact I'll never be in a relationship

I have never been in a relationship. Sure I've had offers but I have always thought that you should be in a relationship with someone who you care about, rather than just being in one for the fact.

All the guys I like never like me. I have made it obvious to people that I like them and it goes nowhere. I attract absolute weirdos, creeps that are just looking for one thing hence why I would never agree to go with someone who is only looking for sex.I have wanted a relationship for a long time now and I constantly beat myself up about it and loathe seeing happy, loved up couples in town. I have accepted the fact that I will never be in relationship, lost all hope...




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Is Resentment a stage like denial, anger, depression?

I've quite clearly felt myself progress through definite stages (e.g. anger or sadness( of processing my husband's betrayal. For the past couple weeks, I feel as if I've entered a stage of "resentment". Did any of you BSs experience resentment more pronounced at a particular time or is it a constant that just gets stronger?

It's really bad. I'm starting to find my husband less attractive and more annoying (even though he is making serious efforts in our relationship). The resentment is great. Will it subside the same way the anger stage did?

I can't believe how I went from adoring him to this. I hope it is a stage of this grief and misery.




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Picking up girls v2

Skip to below if you want to get right to me picking up girls
Some of you may remember me from my previous thread about picking up girls. Essentially, I went out to the street and picked up girls for a few months. I did it about 20-24 times in total, only once or twice with a girl by her own. In the end I managed to solve my social anxiety/retardation, gained incredible amounts of confidence, no longer give a damn what others think of me, I am now able to carry myself well in the presence of girls (I'm no longer creepy or beta in the sense of being scared to do or say things). Probably the best thing about it is that it has envoked a huge sense of opportunism within me, getting **** done and doing things first and not thinking about social norms. I have no doubt this will help me hugely when I try to set up a business in University.

If you want to come here and argue about whether picking up random girls is a good or bad thing you can leave now. I've learned arguing about this is the same as arguing about religion, i.e. pointless.

The difference between the last thread and this one is that I am not going out consciously to pickup girls. I simply don't have the time. Instead, I've found that I'm fine with just seeing girls on the street, or at events/places I go to and approaching them there.

Since my last thread I still haven't kissed a girl or gotten a girlfriend. I'm pretty sure I could solve the former easily if I went to a party and got drunk but that's not my aim. I also asked a girl out in school but I got rejected, because she liked another guy, who she is now going out with (she actually asked him out the same day I asked her out, I like to think I had a part in that! haha)


Picking up girls starts here
My first re-encounter with pick up was two weeks ago where I was at a maths lecture (sucking UCAS's dick) and I saw a really cute girl. I talk to a huge amount of people every time I go to anything like this where I don't know anyone but I noticed one girl that I didn't talk to. She was really cute, probably 8/10. I think I made the excuse of being busy talking to other people and not going up to her, but I went up to her after the lecture and was like 'Hey, you are cute, what's your name?'.
She pretended she had to go somewhere and I wasn't persistent, I could have said 'wait up for a minute' or something. I instantly caved in and just accepted her decision. I also approached her from her side, which was a weird angle. Oh well, I'm glad I've still retained the balls to do this kind of thing. I'm sure I can regain certain aspects of my 'game' as I start doing this again

Note to improve: Be persistent

Today, I went to a physics lecture/master class thing. Once again, I met a huge amount of people, two of which were absolutely awesome. It's pretty cool how despite the majority of people being boring, as long as I try really hard to meet as many people as possible, I'll always find a few amazing people!
As soon as I got into the lecture, I went straight to sit next to a cute girl. I was a bit disappointed when I sat down because this was a 5-6/10. Probably more but she was slightly chubby which really turns me off. Found out she had a boyfriend though (I wasn't flirting or anything) so it's all good.
Two really cute girls sat behind me though, 8/10 and 9-9.5/10. I talked/flirted with them during the breaks as much as I could since the breaks were short, whilst meeting new people (which were mostly guys, since this was a physics lecture...).
At the end I asked the 9.5 for her number and it turns out both of them were going to see their boyfriends.... fml.
I HUGELY ****ed up after this. Before asking her for her number I made myself promise that if I got rejected, I wouldn't ask her friend, the 8 for her number because that's like saying to a girl that you're sloppy seconds which I didn't want to do at all. However when she said she had a boyfriend I cracked and panicked and did ask.... I never want to do this again. It is incredibly prattish.
Still glad I went for it though.

Note to improve: Act suave after failure. I should have made a joke like 'hey all three of you have a boyfriend, how about you screw them and have a foursome with me' or something.
Show off my physique more. I hit the gym now and I'd like to wear tighter t-shirts rather than shirts/jumpers to show this since I don't have a prettyboy face (its not that bad though!)
Remember that it is about what they have proved to me, not what I have proved to them.
Catch myself doing uptalk and stop it
Don't forget to wear deoderant... urghhh


Post any tips/advice. It would be greatly appreciated. Cheers.
Edit: Wonder how the negs will pan out for this thread. Already got two. Last time I got a barrage of negs which slowly turned into a torrent of pos rep as I explained myself, will be interesting.




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Married to a charming man

I want to have faith that my husband doesn't have emotional affairs or worse, but lately I have been seriously questioning his moral and character. Anytime we go out with with a group of people he is the center of attention accepting flirtatious manners and he acts "available."

At work holiday parties or gatherings there's always a new female co-worker introducing themselves to me.

Whenever I started to get the notion he was out of boundary or I get emotional, I tell him what I saw or felt and ask him if he understands and all he can say to every question is, "I don't know," or " what to you mean, what did I do,"

Now when I met him he had me right away, I was intrigued by him and how he can carry on about interesting topics, he's charming. He is easily likable etc...so I know I can't change a person. I just wish he had a little more respect for what we have, family, marriage, and me.

One of his only responses to his behavior when we were out was, " we go out to socialize, "we don't have to just talk to eachother,".
I'm thinking we don't get out enough and socialize or that I'm jealous or something.

How do people live like that? I felt embarrassed or shamed the other night this chick felt on his man boobs and was even flirting with me, she was totally wild, and we should have put the breaks on it and just went home or something.

There's people at this work who have all moved to other departments or got fired and I'm wondering why...

Could he be a cheater? Or just getting comfortable (we've been married going on 7 years)




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levels of adultery - ONS, ongoing or serial cheating

The tears thread and various strength and diversity of responses in it got me thinking about this

That particular sad tale was all based upon a one night stand infidelity and tragically it looks like Mr tears has ended it all and of course no one can blame him for that

In my own experience of a serial adulterer who stupidly I forgave time after time I would have definitely gone on to give a second chance (and no doubt the same results)

I do often see on here the huge efforts to reconcile after one or two chances and all the endless difficulties it causes between the two parties.

I'm surprised a man can make a definite conclusive decision after one indiscretion/mistake especially a one night stand

I can see generally the feeling about ons is that "cheating is cheating and that's that" however I do not subscribe to that being as bad as a prolonged organised destructive deceitful affair that smashes probably two marriages assunder all with forethought and malice.

A one night stand by it's very nature limited damage and often with alcohol involved I don't put quite in the same bracket as planned affairs

I know we are all different and have different boundaries

Do people feel they are the same? that to say "it's all cheating so that's that" it covers all the infidelity sins?




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well...things just got interesting!!

I posted here yesterday and got some great advice about husband who has recently left me, with the assumption that it was to 1)guilt-free continue a PA or 2)start one. Our marriage has been struggling along for a little while and I was sad that his choice was to leave instead of work things out, and also feeling quite low about feeling as though I had "driven him away" by being a naggy, stressed wife and letting our sex life seeeriously lag.

Anyways, so he moved out days ago but has left stuff here. Last night I was motivated to snoop through an old laptop of him. I was able to effortlessly log into an email account that I didn't even really realize that he had.
TONS upon TONS of email conversations with women from a yahoo gaming website. All very very very sexual. Nude pictures from them, from him, all manner of stuff. He had been skyping with them (I didn't even realize he used Skype) and doing webcam stuff....and I am talking several women at a time, on one day a few months ago it looked like he had about two or three cyber sex conversations going on at one time.

In a few of the chats that I could read, him and one particular girl (who apparently lives thousands of miles away somewhere) talk about how they are "dating". It appears as though he was using his real name and also using a fake name, had a fake Facebook account set up....this is INSANE. The real kicker? Looks like he was chatting with some of these girls one night while I was in the hospital after giving birth to our son via c-section last year.

I AM HORRIFIED. And more convinced than ever that he has left to have a PA...he has probably had one before this! I'm not even sad, I am mad and actually so relieved that we are already separated so I don't have to kick is ass out.

The thing is--I'd like to confront him, and I will, but I can already see that he will blame this on me for our lack of connection and lack of sex....but real men SHOULD discuss this with their wives BEFORE turning into some kind of creepy perv on the computer, yes? I am worried there will be a lot of "she brought this on herself" if this info gets out.....he is the nicest guy, but obviously has some serious issues. Who DOES this??!!




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what would you do if you think a woman is in a bad relationship

I am teaching a woman that is a mother of four. She has missed so many of my classes and is always late in handing in her assignments. I talked to her this week.

She really wants to finish her schooling so she can continue with her career for her children. She just moved and has to drop off her children and pick them up at school everyday. I asked her why her children are not taking the school bus and she said it was because they live outside the school district. I asked why she doesn't put her kids into another school so they can take the bus. She didn't want to remove the kids from their school because they wouldn't have their friends and it wouldn't help since they move every couple of months.

She says her husband works all the time and doesn't help her with the children. She also said family refuses to have anything to do with her so she has no one to help her with the children. I asked her is she has friends that could help her and she said no. The kids school does have daycare but she can't afford it. She was in tears when she was telling me her story and I didn't want to push her to tell me more.

I do believe she is trying to better herself but she is stuck between a rock and a hard place. I assume the reason why they move all the time is because they don't pay rent. I have the feeling she wants to succeed because she wants to give her children a better life without her husband.

I gave her advise to apply for reduced child care. She said she was denied in the past. Her husband is a cook and doesn't make that much money so I don't understand why they would be denied.

I told her in the workplace an employer isn't going to let her come and go whenever she felt like it. She said employers let her before. I asked her where she worked before and she told me a bakery for a month, that is her work experience. The poor lady has been taking care of her children with no contact with family or friends for years.

What advise would you give her or is she playing head games with me? Currently she is failing everything.




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Do socially awkward people get boyfriends too?

:(
???




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