It took the VAR to get the evidence that I needed. OMG the hurt...the soul crushing hurt.We had a marriage that I thought was going to be forever. We had the perfect marriage. He lied so much about every tiny little thing and now all that has come to be true. This is going on a year since I first suspected.
I threw him out last night. I also got his girlfriend fired from her job today as well. Still doesn't fix the deep ache.
My blood pressure and heart rate sky rocketed this morning so bad I got scared. Managed to get it down some.
I am absolutely so numb. Their conversations play in my head over and over again. He told her he loved her and that he didn't want me to think that he did all this because of her. He wants me to think he did this because of me. There were times when I questioned my findings because he always denied them. I had that slightest bit of hope that our marriage would survive.
Now I sit here alone and my soul is crushed.
I know what I have to do to get ready for the end. I also know that I have become disabled in the last several years so I depend on his medical coverage. I have to face reality until I can get in the position to officially end all of this.
I know one thing for sure is she will never benefit from anything that we shared in our marriage.
And the saddest part is ....I still love him from so far deep within me. Don't know what to think,what to feel or what to do.
I can't bear the deep heartache.
I am pretty sure he is with her since I threw him out. That in itself there are no words for.
I threw him out last night. I also got his girlfriend fired from her job today as well. Still doesn't fix the deep ache.
My blood pressure and heart rate sky rocketed this morning so bad I got scared. Managed to get it down some.
I am absolutely so numb. Their conversations play in my head over and over again. He told her he loved her and that he didn't want me to think that he did all this because of her. He wants me to think he did this because of me. There were times when I questioned my findings because he always denied them. I had that slightest bit of hope that our marriage would survive.
Now I sit here alone and my soul is crushed.
I know what I have to do to get ready for the end. I also know that I have become disabled in the last several years so I depend on his medical coverage. I have to face reality until I can get in the position to officially end all of this.
I know one thing for sure is she will never benefit from anything that we shared in our marriage.
And the saddest part is ....I still love him from so far deep within me. Don't know what to think,what to feel or what to do.
I can't bear the deep heartache.
I am pretty sure he is with her since I threw him out. That in itself there are no words for.
Put the internet to work for you.
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