I have a friend who was in a relationship and they've just been through an extremely troublesome period, almost like Eastenders. I would like your opinions on the outcome and whether you think they should get back together.
They met when he was 15 and she was 12. Broke up and got back together habitually for 6 years. Had their first kid when he was 21 and she was 18 followed by another kid 2 years later. They were happy when the first kid was born but things became erratic after the birth of the 2nd child. She got post baby blues and was diagnosed bi-polar and he is dis-liked by most people who meet him and has since totted up around £5,000 worth of debt purchasing pointless stuff like a sand beach buggy. For example here's a conversation he had with me last summer.
Him - I'm planning on doing a HGV license so I can be a truck driver.
Me - Cool man, good money?
Him - Yeah and it means lots of time away from my family, getting a fat belly and keeping on the road for days on end.
Me - Err...ok.
Fast forward to 8 months ago, he asks for an open relationship and she agrees. A few months after she meets someone she had a crush on for a long time who showed mutual interest. She kicks her long term partner out their council flat claiming she fell out of love with him. Both parties almost immediately entered rebound relationships, she with the crush and he with a randomer.
Given that both parties rebounded and didn't address the issues behind the split...the next 6 months got extremely ugly. Threats from him. Jealousy inducing behaviour from both parties using their rebounds. Police action for domestic violence when he arrived un-invited to the flat and smashed the front door with his fist shattering the glass. She split up and got back together 4 times in 6 months with her crush, on one of the occasions she had her ex back into the flat and hanging around putting the kids to bed etc, for a week or 2 but re-kicked him out again claiming they had no future. The rebound cycle instantly continued with her going back to the crush, and him moving from his 1st rebound to a 2nd rebound who was almost a complete carbon copy of his ex. Similar age, hair colour, make up, body shape and even 2 kids but the whole time he is telling his long term partner that he still loves her and wants his family back.
So we fast forward 2.5 months to the present day. She has split with her rebound after realising she hasn't recovered from what was a mammoth 12 year relationship with 2 kids and the crush has broken all contact finally putting him out the picture. Presumably her long term partner will now split with his carbon copy 2nd crush and reconciliation can now be considered.
My question is, do you think this couple have a chance of making it work? And what are your opinions; remembering that 12 years is a hell of a lot of history and couples with this much history are regularly willing to "give it one last shot" regardless of what has happened before.
Put the internet to work for you.
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