I only go where I feel wanted

This thing has been playing in my mind for just over a year now and I'm currently swimming out of it but I didn't think I'd be in this situation ever. My dilemma stems from my body dysmorphia, and how unattractive I feel to women in direct relation. I am a bisexual guy. As a bisexual guy, who's a bit muscular and hairy (read bear), I found that I was getting so much more attention from gay men than women; or maybe I am oblivious to some women. Either way, I have geared my attraction to completely become invested in gay men. A side effect of this, is that I am now resentful towards women. Some may say insecure, but it's becoming a hate-filled cesspool inside me and I don't know how to stop, nor am I sure that I want to stop it. It's at the point now where even though I have a lot of guys telling me that I'm hot, my previous experience is overriding any positive feedback I get. I am only investing my time and worth where I feel I am getting any sort of return, and that's with men. For the first time in a long time, I feel at ease now that I have a boyfriend, who is half of my physical type but stimulates my mind so much that I'm slowly beginning to love myself again. I am just filled with hate towards women and I just don't know what to do with it.

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