Wife secretly views BDSM porn........?!

I recently found out that my wife has secretly been viewing porn while I'm out. I'm yet to actually confirm if it's curiosity or to 'get off', but I assume it's the latter. She doesn't know that I know. The bizarre thing about this is that she is viewing really hardcore stuff, and totally not the type of thing I would expect from her. ie: she googles 'forced orgasms', and that brings up results that include all sorts of BDSM and most surprisingly, girl on girl action. We've always been very open about all sorts of things, including fantasies and porn, but she has never ever shown any inkling of an interest in that type of stuff. In fact, she is quite the opposite - she loves to be in control during sex. She hates being submissive and wouldn't even let me hold her hands down, let alone be tied up. While I'm not annoyed or sad about this new revelation, I just find it really surprising and wonder how to deal with it, if at all. There are probably two facets to it: 1) Our sex life isn't amazing right now (frequency wise), and yet she is getting off in private rather than doing it with me, possibly taking that edge off which means less desire/lust/need etc for us to be together or for me to pleasure her. That can't be good. 2) The kinky, fetish, hardcore side of it. As I said we're very open but wow, I had no idea that she would ever watch and certainly not enjoy the type of porn that has women tied up and subjected to all sorts of toys and people pleasuring them. Does this mean she secretly wants that to happen to her..? The simple answer as an outsider may be yes, but knowing her as I do, I would never have thought so because she is soooo not submissive in the bedroom. :scratchhead: Any thoughts, advice, or opinions would be appreciated! Thanks PS: This whole situation is quite ironic as I've been on here before fighting for people to be more accepting and understanding of porn! :p In this case though I don't think it's porn that's a bad thing, it's just that I want an understanding of why she is choosing that type.

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