I know, but she doesn't know that I do

Most of the backstory is here: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/conside...-involved.html Short story: Wife just returned from deployment, we had some rocky periods while she was gone, especially the last few months. I wasn't there to emotionally support her when she needed me because I was having my own misery to deal with and I was looking for support from her. She emotionally detached from me and I caught her flirting with a guy she me while deployed. Confronted her, she said it didn't mean anything and would end it. Fast forward 6 weeks when she gets home I find by looking through her phone that she's still messaging the guy and the chats get more explicit and imply things that had happened. I found an email she sent to him after she returned from deployment about the good times they had together and all the things she liked about him including the sexual horizons expansion. Find out from monitoring her chats that they are planning on hooking up again in about a month when she goes to visit her best friend in Florida and he's home on R&R as well as her making plans to return to the deployment site for a different friend's promotion ceremony. We've been on the rocks, yes but it feels like she came home just to burn down the house with me in it rather than try to work with me on what is going on. I'm going to my own therapy to work on my issues that she pointed out to help me grow into a better person and the changes will help me in the long run but I also feel like she's only really pushing for those changes so she doesn't feel as bad about leaving me when she decides she's given me "enough time" to change and doesn't see the results. I love her and care deeply about her but I don't know if i can recover from the infidelity, especially as it continues "under my nose"

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979