Am I just a whiner?

I feel like my marriage should be more than what I have. My wife doesnt help out around the house, I do the cleaning because I apparently care more (I'm definitely not a neat freak). She has no interest in sex, and I've actually lost weight since we met. Im in decent shape and am interested a couple of times a week. Her? Maybe once every other month at best, and I think it's more that she feels guilty than anything else. She has no interest in going anywhere or doing anything, just staying home watching TV and reading books. We've been on a date maybe 3 times in the last 4 or 5 years, organized by me of course. I want to get out and explore and try things. She's put on a lot of weight and continues to do so. She can't stand for me to see her naked. No sexy clothing whatsoever, sweats and worn out clothes. I even asked her just to wear her underwear (bra and panties) to bed sometimes, but no. There's not a lot of stimulating conversation. She doesn't really have interests outside of escapist fiction. One of her favorite activities is sleeping. She's frequently depressed or down, but carefully in a way that doesn't need solutions. We tried medications, to no avail. I finally got her to go to IC, but only once a month. Now after 3 visits, she says it isnt working. She seems to want to avoid solutions for anything, including the depression, preferring instead to wallow. She's a mediocre parent, and the kids are old enough to realize it. She moves between wanting to be the kids' best friend to being completely checked out. She's also terrible with money. Frequently not working full time when she's supposed to and spending money on whatever. We've struggled financially because of it. I'm a good guy, work hard, make decent money, decent looking, pretty smart, funny. Not a 10, but at least a 7 as marriage material. This has been going on for years, it's not new. It just never gets better. I thought I could tough it out, and that someday she'd snap out of the funk, but I dont see that now. I'm at a point where I don't really give a sh*t. I'm ready to just walk away, consequences be damned. I've been going to IC myself, weekly or every other week and I don't feel like I have any major issues (counselor has confirmed this). I'm ready to go to MC, but I see it as a last ditch effort. Mainly, I'm just tired and alone and want to have a good relationship with someone I can connect with. I thought I could stick it out, but I'm realizing how powerful despair can be. So, am I just being a whiner here?

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