Someone please advise what I should do!? SORRY I KNOW ITS LONG BUT PLEASE READ IT AND LEAVE FEEDBACK, thank you!
(Before anyone gives any comments bare in mind I'm a good person and wouldn't do anything to hurt anyone)
I'm 18 male and Basically I've been talking to this girl for the last 4 days. Yes I know it's not a long time.. And met her on the 2nd day, I knew from the first time I saw her that I liked her, thought she was funny and attractive I would say 9/10, without being too biased.(look at pics I've added - she's 18 too and forgot to met ion if I were a girl I would probably rate myself a 5/6) We talk to each other asif we've been talking for ages, anyway the first time I met up with her (just us 2) we had a lot of fun just talking and cracking a few flirty jokes and talking more personally etc.
The trouble is I'm not a very confident person I'm often anxious and don't act myself around people I'm not familiar/comfortable with. I've never had a proper girlfriend either.
We had been talking for like 2-3 hours and Shortly after this she made a joke about a glow stick I had in my car (she's not wierd just doesn't care about what she's says too much - too an extent) it was something sexual can't remember what? And no it's not a little thin glow stick u get for kids. Anyway when it got personal I asked her if she was with a guy I know. She said friends with benefits, so we carried on talking about how many people we had slept with, she said 4 and I have with 1 person. After this she was going awww awww, anyway I moved in and went for the kiss which took a lot off balls for me, she didn't resist and lasted about 12 seconds, I rubbed her back and leg during but didn't wanna touch her up or anything In case I went too far. Before this moment I liked her and since I like her a lot, however I get mixed feelings but don't want to believe the negative ones.
Because before I started talking to her I was told that she cheated on a guy I know, however she said she was with him but he cheated on her when we were talking. Also apparently she's a slag, but she said only 4 people. I heard these things from my friends who know her less than I did before I started talking to her(not very well) and didn't know I liked her.
So I don't know what to beleive, she wanted me to text her when I got home as I have damaged my car and probably wasn't very safe to drive home. I did and we texted briefly as it was 3am. I brought up how she forgot to take the glow stick as a joke and she said Ohwell got my teddybear, I said I reckon I'm dirty minded too. She said that's good someone who's exactly like me weheeey. I then asked her if the kiss was out of sympathy and explain how she was going aww before, she said no. I said we'll have to do it again sometime then, jokingly and she replied if I'm lucky that is, jokingly too and that she was going to sleep and would pop up in the morning. She did very early, and replied fairly soon. We have been texting saying Hun, prinny, and messing around saying **** and **** etc. She had work and was replying very slowly (she works at petrol station so can often reply quicker, it was like this all day and as time went on they took longer and longer, it took her 40 mins after she would have finished to reply in the end - 80 mins since I sent message. And she said later she was pissed off and was drinking, I tried seeing what was wrong and she said everyone just pisses her off and said that if she didn't want to meet that night anymore - last night (3rd night of talking) we were supposed to meet again, after she finished work but said she had to go to a place about 15-20 mins away via car first, she said she still wanted to meet, I text back asking what time she thought she would be ready and said about 10 (finished work at 7:30) I said okay :) and she didn't reply, I text at 10:25, no reply, 10:45 no reply, 11 no reply so rung her phone 5 past and no answer, I asked whether she was okay in the texts, I drove around the place she said she was goin and the place where she lives and we both meet friends. No sign I ring again at 11:30, she put phone down pretty fast and she text: on way back now, so I text saying finally! I thought u passed out somewhere so drive around looking for you (bare in mind my car isn't rlly safe to drive), she text back saying aww bless you well I'm just on my way boo. I went back to the place she lives and waited 40 minutes and she text saying "this sounds bad if I say I am too drunk to function and I think I need my bed, feel bad that I've made you wait. I said nah it's sweet x, I was fuming and asked if the text was even ment for me, she said yes. I put Ok. And threw my phone going. Mad I had to seriously stop from sending an angry text. I sat in my car for 3 hours waiting for her, with no texts and looked around to place I thought she could be too try and see if she was okay. This morning I text her (4th night) asking wuu2 and stuff she apologised and we went back to talking normally. Later on as we were still texting my friend text me saying she had a bf - the one I asked about and she said friends with benefits. I ask her to be sure and she said well yeah we basically are going out so we had an argument saying how I can't beleive she let me make a move and didn't tell me the truth etc and how I was gunna have to tell him if she didn't, she told me that she didn't lie and she was only started going out with him that day but didn't want to make me feel bad ( I think she was at his house the night before) I apologised and so did she and we've been fine since, but ever since that moment I kissed her and we started talking I feel as though I love her, I know its because I haven't really gone out with anyone but seriously feel so strongly about her because I act myself, I'm confident and have fun with her. So I don't know what to make of the situation I know I should back off because of her and her bf but if I'm honest I don't think it will last that long - I'm hoping, and then I try for myself and see how she feels. I've still been talking other today as usual but with delayed replies apart form a few short bursts of texts.
Please leave your opinions, sorry it's long I just don't feel I can talk to anyone about it as my friends don't know how strongly I feel, she knows as I told her during the texts after she admitted she was going out with him etc, she said she would never want to hurt me etc. Ahh I don't know what she's really like or what to do it's driving me mad I can't stop thinking about her and have to resist texting her. Please reply ASAP I need some guidance 😫 thank you!!
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