I'm a 23 year old male. There is this girl who I've been friends with for the past 4 months, who I have been secretly harbouring feelings for. I've known her a few years, but we never hung out or anything. However, we are both big f ans of dance music and there was a festival on at the end of last October which we both had tickets for. We didn't know anyone else going, so we decided to go together, and this was our first time hanging out together. Since then, we have went to a couple more gigs in my local city before Christmas and have kept contact sporadically via social media. I have to be honest: There wasn't any chemistry or sexual tension between us during any of the times we were together. No signs of flirting, both in person and texting. There have been a couple of ambiguous text messages, but nothing worth talking about. I attribute the lack of chemistry and tension to her simply not being physically attracted to me: She is a very beautiful girl whereas I'm more of an average looking guy. I just feel there is an imbalance on the looks spectrum. Nevertheless, my feelings got pretty strong after Christmas. I decided to play it cool forages, but last weekend I felt it was time to start making my interest known...
So I texted her last Friday night seeing what she was up to. She told me she was watching tv, asked what I was up to and what I was at tomorrow. She then texted me straight away after the text message to see if I wanted to go and see a dj playing later this month in our local city. I told her I was going out tonight, that I would be up for seeing the dj play in March, and then I asked her if she wanted to do something tomorrow. She told me she had an exam (which I know was true) but that she would be up for doing something afterwards. I thought to myself''great, I can bring her out tomorrow night and finally just go for it and see if she's interested as more than a friend''. So on Saturday morning she was online facebook and replied to a wall post of her friends saying ''Yeah I have an exam today but I'll be up for drinks afterwards, let me know''. That burst my bubble, and I felt she wouldn't be making plans with her friends if she was interested in me romantically. Any ways I decided to text her that evening to see if she had any plans for the night. She told me she was just chilling in the house and asked what I was up to. I told her just the same at the moment and asked if she was planning on heading outat all. She said probably not as she was tired after her exam and was just going to relax and watch a tv series. I was hoping together out and let my interest be known through subtle flirting, but seeing as that wasn't happening, I said I would make it known via text. So I texted back saying ''Ah right, that's a shame. I hopet he exam went well any ways. I'll chat to you soon x''. By saying''that's a shame'' and leaving an x (I had never left x's to her before), I felt I was breaking the ice and going beyond 'buddy'texting. So she texted back saying ''Yeah cool, enjoy your night. I would love to do something but I'm actually wrecked.... chat to usoon ;) x''. So, she left me a wink face while also reciprocating my x....
Now, initially I got very excited with that response. But then it dawned on me that it could have just been her keeping my interest at bay. I asked my sister about it, and she said that there's no point reading into that text too much – it could have just been her flirting without any intent. I have got lead on by girls before in the past, so I know that there is a possibility this is the case. Nevertheless, a more blunt reply would have been a closed case for me – she's obviously not interested orshe would have at least reciprocated somewhat. The fact she reciprocated leaves it open to ambiguity and possibilities – she could just be keeping my attention at bay for her own sense of being chased, or it could have been a genuine sign of interest. SO I guess what I'm asking is....... If she is genuinely interested, is it up to her to at least write to me on facebook this weekend and initiate contact? Seeing as I asked her what her plans were both last Friday and Saturday night?
At the moment I'm thinking of texting her on Saturday afternoon to see if she has any plans for the night. If she has an excuse to not head out, then she's obviously not into me. But I think it's fair to say she knows for sure now that I like her as more than a friend. I made it obvious last weekend by asking her if she was up for doing stuff, and then sending that flirty text message....
I'll be the one who suggests we go for a drink or to the cinema if she does contact me, of course. But....If she is interested, will she at least make contact with me before Saturday evening, without necessarily asking me out?
Put the internet to work for you.
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