Married 9+ years, no kids, middle aged and pretty set in our ways. We argue on a regular basis about small and large things and never seem to resolve anything. Some chronic issues: his snoring and unwillingness to even try to do anything about it, my lack of interest in house cleaning and home improvement projects, his negativity, my name calling when we fight. We hardly ever do anything fun or relaxing together anymore. Whenever we do attempt to have a real conversation about any of this (always initiated by me), it degenerates into another typical argument. He thinks we have a good marriage. I don't. It's not what I had in mind for being married.
So I do my thing and he does his and we kind of go about our days tolerating each others' presence, even laughing and goofing around sometimes, but on completely different planes. We don't like the same kind of movies, we can't discuss books because he rarely reads, I'm bored by his thinking out loud about chores or projects he's got to do, his eyes glaze over when I start talking about what some friend said about such and such. He rants about politics and taxes. I refuse to debate with him. We just aren't very compatible. I'm in a different place emotionally than I was when we got married, and I've grown away from him. If we weren't married, he wouldn't be someone I choose to hang out with.
I'm not sure what to do--nothing? Counseling? Divorce? I don't want to make a rash decision, but am not happy in my marriage. Any thoughts on next steps?
So I do my thing and he does his and we kind of go about our days tolerating each others' presence, even laughing and goofing around sometimes, but on completely different planes. We don't like the same kind of movies, we can't discuss books because he rarely reads, I'm bored by his thinking out loud about chores or projects he's got to do, his eyes glaze over when I start talking about what some friend said about such and such. He rants about politics and taxes. I refuse to debate with him. We just aren't very compatible. I'm in a different place emotionally than I was when we got married, and I've grown away from him. If we weren't married, he wouldn't be someone I choose to hang out with.
I'm not sure what to do--nothing? Counseling? Divorce? I don't want to make a rash decision, but am not happy in my marriage. Any thoughts on next steps?
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