my wife has a single friend and she is about 30 years old. My wife and her talk through text and have for many years. They used to work together for a couple of years.
About 6 months ago I sent her friend a text asking her about gift ideas for my wife and she helped me out. I then did not text her for a few months. Then one night she sent me a text and told me that I was wrong for not taking the dogs out one night and making my wife do it. And basically getting on me about it.
Well one thing lead to another and my wife's friend and I started texting like 40 times a day for two months. We talked about a lot of things and a couple of times we were texting and drinking when my wife was asleep.
Sometimes it was harmless and sometimes it was risky texting. She would ask me if I loved my wife, if texting her made me want to cheat etc... She would tell me that my wife has told her everything there is to know about me and teasing me to some extent. And my wife was texting her and discussing our sex life at different times.
While we did not talk about sex between us, we were texting a lot... I told her I wanted to meet with her and even though she was willing to hide the texting she freaked out and told my wife everything and showed her the text messages.
She of course did not show her the ones that made her look bad. I think she was afraid of losing wife as a friend. My wife's therapist told her they were co-dependent.
Honestly, I would have let it get physically..... So now I'm in therapy but my wife is still texting with her friend. My wife tells me she is not texting anything to her about us.
My wife says she does not trust either one of us and is not convinced that nothing happened.
The therapist has told each my wife and I that we have to remove the women from our life. My therapist is telling me that I am stuck in a triangle of a victim, rescuer and persecutor. And that the tree of us are playing a role and switching roles to suit our own need at the time...
Wife wants marriage consoling; I don't think anything will help until the other women are gone.
The strange thing is I think sometimes the wifes friend was really trying to help , but other times I think she liked the attention from me as well. I am very confused, her friend is now blaming me for everything.
About 6 months ago I sent her friend a text asking her about gift ideas for my wife and she helped me out. I then did not text her for a few months. Then one night she sent me a text and told me that I was wrong for not taking the dogs out one night and making my wife do it. And basically getting on me about it.
Well one thing lead to another and my wife's friend and I started texting like 40 times a day for two months. We talked about a lot of things and a couple of times we were texting and drinking when my wife was asleep.
Sometimes it was harmless and sometimes it was risky texting. She would ask me if I loved my wife, if texting her made me want to cheat etc... She would tell me that my wife has told her everything there is to know about me and teasing me to some extent. And my wife was texting her and discussing our sex life at different times.
While we did not talk about sex between us, we were texting a lot... I told her I wanted to meet with her and even though she was willing to hide the texting she freaked out and told my wife everything and showed her the text messages.
She of course did not show her the ones that made her look bad. I think she was afraid of losing wife as a friend. My wife's therapist told her they were co-dependent.
Honestly, I would have let it get physically..... So now I'm in therapy but my wife is still texting with her friend. My wife tells me she is not texting anything to her about us.
My wife says she does not trust either one of us and is not convinced that nothing happened.
The therapist has told each my wife and I that we have to remove the women from our life. My therapist is telling me that I am stuck in a triangle of a victim, rescuer and persecutor. And that the tree of us are playing a role and switching roles to suit our own need at the time...
Wife wants marriage consoling; I don't think anything will help until the other women are gone.
The strange thing is I think sometimes the wifes friend was really trying to help , but other times I think she liked the attention from me as well. I am very confused, her friend is now blaming me for everything.
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