Hi. This is going to be very long, so I beg you to read all of it.
I posted this here because I want it to be anonymous.
So, as you gathered from the Title. I'll be talking about my dad. So I'm not a spoiled kid who thinks that her dad is cheap because he's not getting her a BMW or something.
My dad is an engineer and he earns a quite good amount per month (4500 pound) but he always acts cheaply for instance,
1- We rarely ever eat outside (because of his cheapness and when we do I instinctively choose the cheapest thing on the menu) and he keeps grilling us about it the whole week long for example he could go like (26 pounds (I swear yes 26) oh you spoiled kids) and he could even say things like "didn't we eat out last week or the week before and we spent 26 pounds" or "when I was your age I only ever ate meat once a week"
2- He does things like ordering my sister and I burgers from McDonald's and not getting himself anything (although it's very clear that he's hungry too) My mom even does things like pick up the tomatoes that I threw on the tray and eat it while watching us. (My mom isn't cheap but she's living with my dad so)
3- Today, Mom asked us if we wanted burgers and we insisted that they get a family meal so that we could all eat together. She told me that they weren't hungry. And when I told her that I wanted us to all eat together she was like ok we're not getting anything. My dad remained silent throughout this because he was liking the fact that he isn't going to pay anything.
4- Also Yesterday, My mom hung out with her friends(very rare) and she spent 8 pounds on the food. and then I heard her telling my dad that she's guilty because she could've spent that food on getting us groceries.
5-Whenever I hang out with my friends, I always keep an eye on the money that I'm spending. and when I return home before anything my dad has to ask me about the money that I have left and how much I spent.
6-(I don't want you to think that my mom is the cheap one. Because she is not a working woman (she sacrificed this because she wanted to focus all her attention on us.) My dad knows how dependent she is on him for money and he embarrasses her. Like, on mother's day a few weeks ago,he gave her 23 pounds as a present and was like "happy Mother's Day" she refused to take it.
7-Whenever I spend money on something I like he grills me about it.
8- He makes me feel ****ty about the private lessons that I take because he keeps reminding me of how much they're worth.
9- He records every single thing that he buys on a paper as soon as he returns home. He has files that have papers from 1990. For example, I swear he recorded this on one of his papers "underwear for (my name) = 17 pounds.
10- Above all of this, which kills me, he keeps sending money to his brother's family ( a lot). Like, He sent his brother 2250 pounds so that his son can start a business (not lending. My dad doesn't expect him to return it) He's a spender when it comes to his ****ty family who we never see (they're back at our home country)
11- One time I asked him if he could send me to a better school (more fees) he was like do you know how this money is going to change your cousins' life. (I don't care about my cousins God)
12- One time he called my sister when we were hanging out together (3 of us) just to ask her how much money she spent. He stopped talking to my sister for a while after she told him that money isn't what he should've asked her about, but instead he should have asked if we're having fun or not.
13- He sometimes even goes like "Do you know how much money you and your sisters spent this month?" like it's our fault that he got 5 kids.
14- He even does things like asking me loudly in a store how much something that I liked is worth.
15- He doesn't buy himself new clothes and instead takes his old ones to the tailor to get fixed.
I don't want to exaggerate the situation because the more I complain about his cheapness the more I loathe to see him. I don't want to hate my dad. I know that he came from a very poor town and was poor as a child but why do we have to live in the shadow of his childhood now that he's in a much better position. Sometimes I feel like he thinks that whatever money he gets is more than he deserves (which is wrong because he works soo hard)
He's not always like, I reread the post and I feel that if anyone who doesn't know who my dad is, is probably going to hate him and think of him as a disgusting man)
I just want to feel better about it, but I don't know how. I want someone to tell me that it;s natural because I'm just 15 and I feel like I shouldn't care about this. I also do not want to be cheap when I grow up.
Put the internet to work for you.
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