Just looking for opinions:
Recently FWH, I (the BS) and the OWH ran into each other at a public function. My FWH had sent OWH an apology letter about a year after DDay when he also sent OW a NC letter. He had also contacted him more recently to let him know that his OW was still trying to contact him and that he wanted her to stop. After trying to ignore her attempts to contact FWH for over a year, we both agreed it was time to let her H know what she was up to. OWH apologized for her behavior and excused it by saying she had "low self esteem"..blah, blah, blah. She has not attempted contact since then.
So at this public function where the OW was not at, OWH and FWH carried on a conversation just like it was old times. They had been friends and even worked together occasionally on miscellaneous jobs. We had formerly been occasional social friends and still have many friends in common. I actually run into him more often than my husband but never with his wife the OW.
I really don't know how to take this exchange but found it exceedingly strange that OWH could act as if nothing was amiss considering my FWH had banged his wife for 6 years! And my FWH acted as if this guy was simply one of his pals...no embarrassment whatsoever. You can imagine how I triggered when OWH even brought the OW up in the conversation as if we were still friends!
I talked to my H about my bad feelings/confusion and he could give no explanation for how this is possible. I did make it very clear I would not tolerate any normalizing of our relationships with them. What am I not understanding here? How could OWH act if nothing had ever happened? Am I being too sensitive? Should I even care if FWH and OWH renew their friendship?
Would appreciate any opinion as to what might be going on in the male psyches of these two....and what my attitude should be...thanks.
Recently FWH, I (the BS) and the OWH ran into each other at a public function. My FWH had sent OWH an apology letter about a year after DDay when he also sent OW a NC letter. He had also contacted him more recently to let him know that his OW was still trying to contact him and that he wanted her to stop. After trying to ignore her attempts to contact FWH for over a year, we both agreed it was time to let her H know what she was up to. OWH apologized for her behavior and excused it by saying she had "low self esteem"..blah, blah, blah. She has not attempted contact since then.
So at this public function where the OW was not at, OWH and FWH carried on a conversation just like it was old times. They had been friends and even worked together occasionally on miscellaneous jobs. We had formerly been occasional social friends and still have many friends in common. I actually run into him more often than my husband but never with his wife the OW.
I really don't know how to take this exchange but found it exceedingly strange that OWH could act as if nothing was amiss considering my FWH had banged his wife for 6 years! And my FWH acted as if this guy was simply one of his pals...no embarrassment whatsoever. You can imagine how I triggered when OWH even brought the OW up in the conversation as if we were still friends!
I talked to my H about my bad feelings/confusion and he could give no explanation for how this is possible. I did make it very clear I would not tolerate any normalizing of our relationships with them. What am I not understanding here? How could OWH act if nothing had ever happened? Am I being too sensitive? Should I even care if FWH and OWH renew their friendship?
Would appreciate any opinion as to what might be going on in the male psyches of these two....and what my attitude should be...thanks.
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