On 4/29/2013, my wife finally confessed to cheating on me in the fall of 2000 while on a trip with friends. When she came home, she didn't have the backbone to tell me, but did treat me like scum, and move out of our house, taking our 3, 4, and 7 year old kids with her. Two weeks later, she moved back in ( at my request). At that time I suspected she had cheated, because she was calling a guy in the town that she had traveled to. I called the guy and ask him if he had slept with my wife, and he said " I'll let her answer that." I felt the answer then, even though she vehemently denied it.
Well, last April, she found him on FB and started talking to him. When I noticed it on the phone bill, she confessed all. She expected me to get over it immediately, and was very remorseful, and opened up all her life to me. I knew passwords, to every account she had and she understood my need for accountability. She refused to go to MC, but I went for year.
I have battled the urge for revenge cheating. I have rebuilt my destroyed self-esteem, and I honestly think I have forgiven her. I have tried to act as the father to the prodigal son, but often act as the brother.
The past week I have been really down, and often fighting the recurring thoughts of their "togetherness", and even searching the guy up on google.
I have read on here (as a visiting non-member) that healing takes time. The pain will lessen over time, and that none of this is my fault. I truly want this marriage to work, and I am eager to find a way that this will become a testimony to God's magnificent grace; but, my issue is that during these past few days, I am wondering if divorce is the only way for me to shake myself from it all.
Can someone please give me words of encouragement to stay?
We have been married for 22 years.
Well, last April, she found him on FB and started talking to him. When I noticed it on the phone bill, she confessed all. She expected me to get over it immediately, and was very remorseful, and opened up all her life to me. I knew passwords, to every account she had and she understood my need for accountability. She refused to go to MC, but I went for year.
I have battled the urge for revenge cheating. I have rebuilt my destroyed self-esteem, and I honestly think I have forgiven her. I have tried to act as the father to the prodigal son, but often act as the brother.
The past week I have been really down, and often fighting the recurring thoughts of their "togetherness", and even searching the guy up on google.
I have read on here (as a visiting non-member) that healing takes time. The pain will lessen over time, and that none of this is my fault. I truly want this marriage to work, and I am eager to find a way that this will become a testimony to God's magnificent grace; but, my issue is that during these past few days, I am wondering if divorce is the only way for me to shake myself from it all.
Can someone please give me words of encouragement to stay?
We have been married for 22 years.
Put the internet to work for you.
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