| We have been married 21 years. When we met we could talk about things, our past relationships, our kids.....we had fun. He was a bit of a nerd, I could see that and coudl see why women were not attracted to him. I thought he was "safe" in the sense1that he seemed to have accepted his place with women and was not a persuer like my ex......my ex was a player who had many one-night stands and affairs uring our marriage. What I could not see at the time was how consumed he was with women in fanasty thought, very indulgent fantasy. He pretty much stayed to himself, not real open but seemed content to do things with me if I asked him or I went to him. I was not comfortable with the one-sidedness of the relationship but again I wasn't being threatened like I felt in my first marriage, first husband had a horrible temper. We both had children from our previous marriages. While the kids were home I had something to focus on. There always remain a distance. There became issues with porn and with his lack of desire to control his drinking, not a drunk but does love to party......we are in our early 50's. Only on child left at home and I feel I can't take it anymore. I am tired of being ignored. I need conversation, interaction. I realize too I don't trust this man and am no longer attracted to my husband. Just wondering if all men are soley about sex and cannot attach or have conversation but yet seek every skirt out there? Basically, I have done this twice now and I don't see a huge difference in the men in my life. 'and are these feelings normal after 21 years of marriage? | |||
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