Is there any real chance of a father actually getting custody of children if he is truly the more competent, involved parent?
I am in such a situation. I get one of my kids ready for school and take her every morning. The other child (we have two) is home schooled and take care of 100 percent of his lessons.
Furthermore, I do 95% of the cooking, laundry and cleaning (or hire it done.)
I take my kids to all their extra activities.
If there is a birthday party, I take kids.
I don't think she's ever read them a book.
I take my kids to church. Wife stays home.
She has NEVER gotten them completely ready for school by herself. Not one time. Even if I'm sick, I help.
I am the sole earner. My wife stays home.
Many times I'll come home for lunch to monitor my homeschooled son and will find my wife still in bed. If I don't come home, he usually has to fix his own lunch.
My wife is completely disengaged from the family. She used to be involved with school (she was pta president) and church (she did nursery every Sunday morning) and with other activities. Now she goes out with "friends" that have not kids, they have crappy marriages, and I get griped out if question this.
Is she depressed? Yes. She is on medication. She also has Rheumatoid Arthritis. She's in pain.
I could deal with that. I promised to love her sickness and health after all. I'd bear all the load I am bearing now. But along with all this, she nags me all the time. The yard always needs mowing. The garage is a mess. (How can I do this when I am cooking and cleaning all the time?)
She claims I am controlling. Here evidence is that I don't like her smoking and I think she should quit. I think she "goes out" too much. She regularly stays up all night. She claims I tell her what to do all the time. She does not like that I cook and clean and that is me controlling her. (When she is too cook, pizza usually shows up.)
But she travels (three "scrapbooking weekends the last three months and she has visited her biological family clear across the country 5 times in the last 5 years. Sometimes for over two weeks.)
She has her own bank account and her own credit card that I do not have access to.
I don't keep her from her family or her friends. I don't control her money.
I could go on.
I feel badly about her illnesses. She is getting all the treatment possible for it. Yet at the same time I can't take all the fighting. I can't take her accusing me of being "controlling." I also can't take her yelling and cussing at my son anymore either. Everything I do is wrong. My 12 year old son sees what is going on.
The reality is that I want out. I can't believe it but I do. But I don't want to lose my kids. I really believe that she could not handle the children and a job (which I'd guess the court would ask her to get.) You can't be a single mom and sleep till noon and go out with friends all the time.
We have gone to counseling. My wife hates it because she perceives that the counselor is on my side. I also made the arrangement, which makes her mad. I've told her to get a different one of her choosing, but she will not.
So, assuming all this is true, and that I can prove it, what are my chances of getting my kids? I'd like to "share" custody…give their mother equal authority, but have them live with me.
I am in such a situation. I get one of my kids ready for school and take her every morning. The other child (we have two) is home schooled and take care of 100 percent of his lessons.
Furthermore, I do 95% of the cooking, laundry and cleaning (or hire it done.)
I take my kids to all their extra activities.
If there is a birthday party, I take kids.
I don't think she's ever read them a book.
I take my kids to church. Wife stays home.
She has NEVER gotten them completely ready for school by herself. Not one time. Even if I'm sick, I help.
I am the sole earner. My wife stays home.
Many times I'll come home for lunch to monitor my homeschooled son and will find my wife still in bed. If I don't come home, he usually has to fix his own lunch.
My wife is completely disengaged from the family. She used to be involved with school (she was pta president) and church (she did nursery every Sunday morning) and with other activities. Now she goes out with "friends" that have not kids, they have crappy marriages, and I get griped out if question this.
Is she depressed? Yes. She is on medication. She also has Rheumatoid Arthritis. She's in pain.
I could deal with that. I promised to love her sickness and health after all. I'd bear all the load I am bearing now. But along with all this, she nags me all the time. The yard always needs mowing. The garage is a mess. (How can I do this when I am cooking and cleaning all the time?)
She claims I am controlling. Here evidence is that I don't like her smoking and I think she should quit. I think she "goes out" too much. She regularly stays up all night. She claims I tell her what to do all the time. She does not like that I cook and clean and that is me controlling her. (When she is too cook, pizza usually shows up.)
But she travels (three "scrapbooking weekends the last three months and she has visited her biological family clear across the country 5 times in the last 5 years. Sometimes for over two weeks.)
She has her own bank account and her own credit card that I do not have access to.
I don't keep her from her family or her friends. I don't control her money.
I could go on.
I feel badly about her illnesses. She is getting all the treatment possible for it. Yet at the same time I can't take all the fighting. I can't take her accusing me of being "controlling." I also can't take her yelling and cussing at my son anymore either. Everything I do is wrong. My 12 year old son sees what is going on.
The reality is that I want out. I can't believe it but I do. But I don't want to lose my kids. I really believe that she could not handle the children and a job (which I'd guess the court would ask her to get.) You can't be a single mom and sleep till noon and go out with friends all the time.
We have gone to counseling. My wife hates it because she perceives that the counselor is on my side. I also made the arrangement, which makes her mad. I've told her to get a different one of her choosing, but she will not.
So, assuming all this is true, and that I can prove it, what are my chances of getting my kids? I'd like to "share" custody…give their mother equal authority, but have them live with me.
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