Sorry for the long backstory but I feel its neccisary to understand who we are and what is going on.
My wife and I have been together for 14 years, married for 10 in Feb. We have a 9 year old daughter and a 4 year old son. Things for the last few years had gotten a little rocky between us. Nothing too bad though. We met our freshman year in high school. So as you would imagine our relationship grew with us. She was over weight when we met which was fine with me as I valued her personality and sensitivity. I felt very alone at that point in my life and she gave my life a purpose. We have had more than our share of ups and downs along the way. she had 9 surgeries done n her ankle in high school, an ovary removed, she is disabled due to fibro and about 20 other issues ,and the last surgery was the gastric bypass. I have been by her side to support and take care of her to the best of my ability. Although I admit that I wish I could have been more emotionally there for her. We had our fights like most couples do with the yelling and swearing, In the beginning after all the pu ppy love went away and life happened I would loose my temper and occasionally break things etc. That sort of thing is a rarity now as I would choose to walk away and talk later, but we still get into it. I have made a lot of progress to become the man I am and someday the man I hope to be. We are moved out of our apartment and into a home now which I thought would alleviate some of the stress, however during the move my wife had gastric bypass surgery with complications and wasn't able to eat or drink anything for a month after. She is doing wonderful as far as her weight loss goes, over 140 lbs.
Over the past 5 months she has secluded herself to playing Xbox most of the day. We rarely do anything together any more. About 2 months ago we started seeing a marriage councilor and have spent a little time together. She says she is unhappy with all the mistreatment she put up with during the course of our relationship. I should also clarify that I have had an issue with porn addition for most of my life and that is a big part of it. We have grown apart so far now that we are debating divorce or separation. She says she has a hard time putting her hurt behind her. We both agree that we would like to work through this together and not separate but I don't see her doing anything to spend time with me or working to improve the state of our relationship. I try to initiate spending time together but after getting shot down over and over I just come home and watch movies or play games by myself. I am grasping for any reason to stay here and keep going but I cant seem to find one. any advice would be much appreciated.
My wife and I have been together for 14 years, married for 10 in Feb. We have a 9 year old daughter and a 4 year old son. Things for the last few years had gotten a little rocky between us. Nothing too bad though. We met our freshman year in high school. So as you would imagine our relationship grew with us. She was over weight when we met which was fine with me as I valued her personality and sensitivity. I felt very alone at that point in my life and she gave my life a purpose. We have had more than our share of ups and downs along the way. she had 9 surgeries done n her ankle in high school, an ovary removed, she is disabled due to fibro and about 20 other issues ,and the last surgery was the gastric bypass. I have been by her side to support and take care of her to the best of my ability. Although I admit that I wish I could have been more emotionally there for her. We had our fights like most couples do with the yelling and swearing, In the beginning after all the pu ppy love went away and life happened I would loose my temper and occasionally break things etc. That sort of thing is a rarity now as I would choose to walk away and talk later, but we still get into it. I have made a lot of progress to become the man I am and someday the man I hope to be. We are moved out of our apartment and into a home now which I thought would alleviate some of the stress, however during the move my wife had gastric bypass surgery with complications and wasn't able to eat or drink anything for a month after. She is doing wonderful as far as her weight loss goes, over 140 lbs.
Over the past 5 months she has secluded herself to playing Xbox most of the day. We rarely do anything together any more. About 2 months ago we started seeing a marriage councilor and have spent a little time together. She says she is unhappy with all the mistreatment she put up with during the course of our relationship. I should also clarify that I have had an issue with porn addition for most of my life and that is a big part of it. We have grown apart so far now that we are debating divorce or separation. She says she has a hard time putting her hurt behind her. We both agree that we would like to work through this together and not separate but I don't see her doing anything to spend time with me or working to improve the state of our relationship. I try to initiate spending time together but after getting shot down over and over I just come home and watch movies or play games by myself. I am grasping for any reason to stay here and keep going but I cant seem to find one. any advice would be much appreciated.
Put the internet to work for you.
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