My husband says "you don't realize how you sound to me", meaning I talk to him with a tone he doesn't like. I honestly never want to speak to him or anyone else in a way that is unkind. After sleeping on it I began to wonder if I am using a sharp tone of voice, not to be *****y, but as my way of being heard the first time and not having to repeat myself. If he asks a yes or no question I will answer a clear and sharp "Yes". I could see how that might come across as curt. If I say something to him I have to repeat almost every first thing unless I already have his attention to begin with. When he asks me something he will often say "huh?" before I even get started answering. After years of this I may be overcompensating my talking in a louder, sharper, more concise tone that is coming across in a hurtful way that is not intended at all. Is this common? I just want to know if this is a poor communication style that can develop when one spouse gets tired of repeating themselves.
Please....this is causing me some serious self doubt and feelings of hopelessness after all these years.:(
He has so far refused a hearing exam. He is 64, and has had a history of loud rock and roll (a child of the 60s) and hunting without ear protection. I'm 54 and have unusally acute hearing...if I stand under our pendant lamp I can hearing the electricity buzzing.
Thank you.
Please....this is causing me some serious self doubt and feelings of hopelessness after all these years.:(
He has so far refused a hearing exam. He is 64, and has had a history of loud rock and roll (a child of the 60s) and hunting without ear protection. I'm 54 and have unusally acute hearing...if I stand under our pendant lamp I can hearing the electricity buzzing.
Thank you.
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