I live in a US state which has legalized medical cannabis. I am married for 10 years, and have 3 children. Two are from my first marriage.
My marriage is in a good place, my wife and I love and respect one another, and we have good communication generally speaking.
In my late teens and through my 20s (like many people) I tried and used cannabis off and on. As such, I see it in a positive light, and in my opinion, those who drink alcohol and at the same time say things against cannabis, are either ignorant to it, or programmed by the negative view that was cast upon it since the early 70s in the US. Cannabis has many benefits, and is so much less destructive to your system than alcohol, not physically addictive, and actually has positive effects which can be used for specific medical conditions depending on the strain you use. It is a better option than the opiates American doctors prescribe for pain, and so often, patients become addicted to, and even die from. Yes, it also provides an excellent mellow high and your head doesn't hurt in the morning. In my personal values system, I see only good where this is concerned. That said, I have not used it except for a couple of occasions over the last 15 years.
I have a few medical conditions which in my state constitute the right to legally register to use cannabis for medical purposes - which include chronic severe pain and muscle spasms, as well as anxiety and insomnia. I recently was told by a medical professional that cannabis would be a recommended therapy for my conditions.
My wife grew up in an "alcohol culture" where cannabis was vilified and she has never touched it, let alone would she be willing to try.
I've discussed it with her as a possibility for me - not only for chronic pain as it happens, but to relax in the evening against anxiety - (like she does with wine and beer) and to help sleep as needed. I told her I would be willing to ingest it without smoking it - and for the little bit I would use - I could easily avoid the children seeing it. I would be totally responsible with it. But... despite her usual ability to be very logical and set aside emotions - she just cannot accept it as a possibility for me. She believes all of the lies that we were all told for the last 45 years about cannabis. I've tried to point out the benefits, and that alcohol in itself is nothing more than a drug - ethanol - which she uses regularly when she relaxes in the evenings herself.
I realize that this is a big pill for a spouse to swallow after 10 years. (Yes, BTW - she knew that I had used cannabis when I was younger). At the same time, I see this as my right in the state I live in, a medical recommendation, and at my age, I don't see why I should be restricted from something so harmless - and positive - by my life partner - any more than I would have the right to tell her not to consume certain drinks or medicines.
I could very easily just go ahead and get my certification and try to keep it on the low down, but that would not be sustainable, and I would feel wrong about it. That would be deceit - and I don't want that in our relationship.
Am I wrong to hope that she could see beyond the way the US and the country she grew up in has taught us to think about this? Should I keep beating the drum for a while and hope she comes around to the idea?
It also appears that my state will be putting full legalization (recreational) to a vote next year, and if it passes (which is more likely than it was in the past) the following summer prohibition would come to an end. I could also just try to wait it out and keep discussing it until then, but I don't see why I should have to. This is our life as a marriage, but it's my life too - as much as it is hers - and as long as I don't try to restrict her from any benign thing that she wants to do.. I feel like I deserve the same respect. I'm not talking about standing naked on the roof... I'm talking about pain relief at times, and relaxing together, at home.
I don't hope to get into long discussions about law or what people think (or were told to think) of cannabis itself as much as I hope for objective thoughts on how situations like this might be best handled - regardless of what it might be.
Thanks for reading and replying.
My marriage is in a good place, my wife and I love and respect one another, and we have good communication generally speaking.
In my late teens and through my 20s (like many people) I tried and used cannabis off and on. As such, I see it in a positive light, and in my opinion, those who drink alcohol and at the same time say things against cannabis, are either ignorant to it, or programmed by the negative view that was cast upon it since the early 70s in the US. Cannabis has many benefits, and is so much less destructive to your system than alcohol, not physically addictive, and actually has positive effects which can be used for specific medical conditions depending on the strain you use. It is a better option than the opiates American doctors prescribe for pain, and so often, patients become addicted to, and even die from. Yes, it also provides an excellent mellow high and your head doesn't hurt in the morning. In my personal values system, I see only good where this is concerned. That said, I have not used it except for a couple of occasions over the last 15 years.
I have a few medical conditions which in my state constitute the right to legally register to use cannabis for medical purposes - which include chronic severe pain and muscle spasms, as well as anxiety and insomnia. I recently was told by a medical professional that cannabis would be a recommended therapy for my conditions.
My wife grew up in an "alcohol culture" where cannabis was vilified and she has never touched it, let alone would she be willing to try.
I've discussed it with her as a possibility for me - not only for chronic pain as it happens, but to relax in the evening against anxiety - (like she does with wine and beer) and to help sleep as needed. I told her I would be willing to ingest it without smoking it - and for the little bit I would use - I could easily avoid the children seeing it. I would be totally responsible with it. But... despite her usual ability to be very logical and set aside emotions - she just cannot accept it as a possibility for me. She believes all of the lies that we were all told for the last 45 years about cannabis. I've tried to point out the benefits, and that alcohol in itself is nothing more than a drug - ethanol - which she uses regularly when she relaxes in the evenings herself.
I realize that this is a big pill for a spouse to swallow after 10 years. (Yes, BTW - she knew that I had used cannabis when I was younger). At the same time, I see this as my right in the state I live in, a medical recommendation, and at my age, I don't see why I should be restricted from something so harmless - and positive - by my life partner - any more than I would have the right to tell her not to consume certain drinks or medicines.
I could very easily just go ahead and get my certification and try to keep it on the low down, but that would not be sustainable, and I would feel wrong about it. That would be deceit - and I don't want that in our relationship.
Am I wrong to hope that she could see beyond the way the US and the country she grew up in has taught us to think about this? Should I keep beating the drum for a while and hope she comes around to the idea?
It also appears that my state will be putting full legalization (recreational) to a vote next year, and if it passes (which is more likely than it was in the past) the following summer prohibition would come to an end. I could also just try to wait it out and keep discussing it until then, but I don't see why I should have to. This is our life as a marriage, but it's my life too - as much as it is hers - and as long as I don't try to restrict her from any benign thing that she wants to do.. I feel like I deserve the same respect. I'm not talking about standing naked on the roof... I'm talking about pain relief at times, and relaxing together, at home.
I don't hope to get into long discussions about law or what people think (or were told to think) of cannabis itself as much as I hope for objective thoughts on how situations like this might be best handled - regardless of what it might be.
Thanks for reading and replying.
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