I've just broken up with my girlfriend of about 1 year. We were in the same school year, she's now in first year at a top university and I'm on a gap year. We were doing very well, and were totally in love over the spring and the summer. When she went to uni, we tried the whole long distance thing and I visited her regularly for the first couple of months. Gradually we drifted apart as she had to study more and more, and we started talking less regularly, and confiding in each other less. It came to a head before Christmas, when she told me she was considering breaking up because we never saw each other (she has always worked super hard, and she didn't seem to be able to make much time for me). We talked things over, and took a few days to think things through then we made up, and were good again.
Then she went on holiday for the winter with some friends from uni. We texted and spoke regularly for about a week, then she only texted me every 1 or 2 days. When she got back she went straight back to uni, and texted me saying we need to talk.
Yesterday we broke up. She said couldn't cope with having a partner she couldn't see often and it was only going to get worse (I'm going away volunteering for 3 months in a week). She told me I deserved someone who wanted to be in a relationship, and said we could have worked if the circumstances were different, which I thought referred to my volunteering. We've both been dreading it for months as far as our relationship is concerned, and I had seen this coming. I agreed with her, and we decided to be friends.
Except now I'm at home and I'm absolutely distraught. Just before our talk, I was planning to tell her about how much i loved her and how great we had been and try desperately to change her mind, but I didn't say anything like that, I just agreed and told her it had been fun. I can'tt think why I didn't say it to her at the time, maybe I was scared to lose her even as a friend, but I feel terrible now like I could have done something. What can I do? I know it's not exactly an enticing deal, get back together then wait 3 months for me to come back only to be in a long distance relationship when there are hordes of guys swimming around at her university that she can see all the time. Deep down I feel like I know she won't want to get back together, but I'll never forgive myself if I don't at least say something. But I don't want to lose her as a friend either! What should I do? Anyone?
Then she went on holiday for the winter with some friends from uni. We texted and spoke regularly for about a week, then she only texted me every 1 or 2 days. When she got back she went straight back to uni, and texted me saying we need to talk.
Yesterday we broke up. She said couldn't cope with having a partner she couldn't see often and it was only going to get worse (I'm going away volunteering for 3 months in a week). She told me I deserved someone who wanted to be in a relationship, and said we could have worked if the circumstances were different, which I thought referred to my volunteering. We've both been dreading it for months as far as our relationship is concerned, and I had seen this coming. I agreed with her, and we decided to be friends.
Except now I'm at home and I'm absolutely distraught. Just before our talk, I was planning to tell her about how much i loved her and how great we had been and try desperately to change her mind, but I didn't say anything like that, I just agreed and told her it had been fun. I can'tt think why I didn't say it to her at the time, maybe I was scared to lose her even as a friend, but I feel terrible now like I could have done something. What can I do? I know it's not exactly an enticing deal, get back together then wait 3 months for me to come back only to be in a long distance relationship when there are hordes of guys swimming around at her university that she can see all the time. Deep down I feel like I know she won't want to get back together, but I'll never forgive myself if I don't at least say something. But I don't want to lose her as a friend either! What should I do? Anyone?
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