So my wife is quite LD, but as some of you who have read some of my previous posts know, once she gets going, she's a beast in bed. The sex is relatively rare (2-4 times a month, maybe), but it's GOOD, so I don't complain too much.
It's always initiated by me, always. The extremely rare time I don't have a hand in it is when it's been "too long", and her way of initiating is pretty much to say exactly that, or something along those lines.
After years of calm and constructive discussion with her, she seems to have finally "got it".
So, after yet another discussion about this issue (ie me not feeling wanted, her never being sexual until we're in bed actually having sex, etc.) we turned a corner, it seems.
But I screwed it up... lol. Well, I can't say *I* screwed it up, it just didn't quite work out.
I came back home late one evening after going out to play my weekly sports with the boys, and she's in bed, dressed in lingerie (but sleeping). After I shower, I crawl into bed and snuggle up with her, she wakes up, and one thing leads to another.
But it didn't lead very far. Although she was dressed and ready for it, and seemingly willing, she still left it up to me to make the moves (which is fine, I'm usually the aggressor), however I was tired after an hour of running around and sweating, so I was hoping for a bit more 50/50 split on the touchy-feely.
So strike #1.
So I move my hand south, under her panties, and after a few minutes of this she pretty much barks "would you just take them off already?" (I guess they weren't too comfortable, and the backside of them were riding up into her nether regions... lol)
I feel she could have been a little more, uh, sexy, in asking me this, or just have removed them herself.
Strike #2
She finally gets a little handsy, and starts to touch me, but I was just out of the shower, and her hands were DRY. No lubrication whatsoever. And she was a little rougher than I'm used to, so big time chafing. I don't say anything for a little bit, but it got to the point that it was more painful than pleasurable, so I tell her it's a little uncomfortable.
Strike #3
Once we get over all of that, my drive is waning a bit, but we start kissing pretty heavily. She usually bites my lower lip (which I like), but for some reason she really chomps down on it this time, and it made me yelp in pain and pull away. It still hurt the next morning (no blood though).
Strike #4
So at this point, I have no drive, the blood is no longer going where it's supposed to, and I pretty much tell her this isn't happening.
She acts all upset, and rolls over. I try to spoon her, but she's having none of it. She's pissed.
I barely slept that night... aaargh. Here she is, finally making an effort, but somehow she/I sabotaged it.
I start to wonder if it was all just a cluster ____ or if somehow subconsciously she sabotaged it. Or geez, even consciously.
What do you guys think? There was NO way I could continue, it wasn't happening. It was one thing after another.
Did I miss my chance and now things will never get to that point again, and I'm back to square one?
It's almost (ALMOST) funny how it worked out. Just my luck. :rolleyes:
It's always initiated by me, always. The extremely rare time I don't have a hand in it is when it's been "too long", and her way of initiating is pretty much to say exactly that, or something along those lines.
After years of calm and constructive discussion with her, she seems to have finally "got it".
So, after yet another discussion about this issue (ie me not feeling wanted, her never being sexual until we're in bed actually having sex, etc.) we turned a corner, it seems.
But I screwed it up... lol. Well, I can't say *I* screwed it up, it just didn't quite work out.
I came back home late one evening after going out to play my weekly sports with the boys, and she's in bed, dressed in lingerie (but sleeping). After I shower, I crawl into bed and snuggle up with her, she wakes up, and one thing leads to another.
But it didn't lead very far. Although she was dressed and ready for it, and seemingly willing, she still left it up to me to make the moves (which is fine, I'm usually the aggressor), however I was tired after an hour of running around and sweating, so I was hoping for a bit more 50/50 split on the touchy-feely.
So strike #1.
So I move my hand south, under her panties, and after a few minutes of this she pretty much barks "would you just take them off already?" (I guess they weren't too comfortable, and the backside of them were riding up into her nether regions... lol)
I feel she could have been a little more, uh, sexy, in asking me this, or just have removed them herself.
Strike #2
She finally gets a little handsy, and starts to touch me, but I was just out of the shower, and her hands were DRY. No lubrication whatsoever. And she was a little rougher than I'm used to, so big time chafing. I don't say anything for a little bit, but it got to the point that it was more painful than pleasurable, so I tell her it's a little uncomfortable.
Strike #3
Once we get over all of that, my drive is waning a bit, but we start kissing pretty heavily. She usually bites my lower lip (which I like), but for some reason she really chomps down on it this time, and it made me yelp in pain and pull away. It still hurt the next morning (no blood though).
Strike #4
So at this point, I have no drive, the blood is no longer going where it's supposed to, and I pretty much tell her this isn't happening.
She acts all upset, and rolls over. I try to spoon her, but she's having none of it. She's pissed.
I barely slept that night... aaargh. Here she is, finally making an effort, but somehow she/I sabotaged it.
I start to wonder if it was all just a cluster ____ or if somehow subconsciously she sabotaged it. Or geez, even consciously.
What do you guys think? There was NO way I could continue, it wasn't happening. It was one thing after another.
Did I miss my chance and now things will never get to that point again, and I'm back to square one?
It's almost (ALMOST) funny how it worked out. Just my luck. :rolleyes:
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